


In Service to the Inquisitor

by barbex



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Collars, Cullen in lingerie, Cunnilingus, D/s, D/s relationship, Dom/sub, Drug Withdrawal, Enthusiastic Consent, Explicit Consent, F/M, Flogging, Light BDSM, Light Dom/sub, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Praise Kink, Puppy Play, Spanking, Sub Cullen, Sub Cullen Rutherford, Verbal Humiliation, enchanted cock rings, misuse of prayer bench, pain play, reluctant domme, soft domme, sub!cullen, this was supposed to be just smut and now it caught FEELINGS
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-22 07:18:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 38,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13162008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barbex/pseuds/barbex
Summary: The Inquisitor is tense and unsatisfied. What she needs is sex but on her terms. And who could offer himself as a sexual servant to her?Cullen loves to serve her. She would never force him to do things he really dislikes but she challenges him in his submission. He needs this, to feel claimed, to be ordered. There is freedom in obedience.It could all be so simple, if only their hearts wouldn't interfere.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how it happened and why Cullen, but goodness me, Cullen is so very subby to me. I can't stop thinking about this. I'm doing my best to write the D/s dynamic in a healthy way and blueteaparty is helping me with that. Thank you for beta reading this and pointing out the consent issues. 
> 
> Readers who've seen this on tumblr first: this first chapter is mostly unchanged but I changed some things in later chapters to have Cullen give clear consent to participate in the game. 
> 
> Alissa will be a soft domme, this fic will not feature hardcore BDSM practices.

* * *

Alissa Lavellan paces. From the desk to the staircase and back. Again and again. Leliana once remarked that she would wear grooves into the carpet but a scowl from Alissa, the Inquisitor, can quiet even the Nightingale.

Heavy footsteps on the stairs indicate that the Iron Bull is coming up, he is the only one who dares to disturb her in her mood.

"Boss," his deep voice reverberates through the room, "what can I do for you?"

"I didn't send for you?" she says, scowling at him.

"No, but maybe you should've. You're in a bad mood, you snapped at Cassandra _and_ Vivienne! Not even I dare to do that and I'm a big scary qunari and you're a tiny elf. And you're so scary right now that I think you almost made Josephine cry."

"Oh no, I have to apologize to her, " Alissa says with a groan.

"You've been acting irritated for days now. What's wrong?" He leans against the wall and watches her with his eye as she keeps pacing.

She combs through her short hair with her fingers and stops in front of him. "It's all so much. It's all so...so always, so much, always me, never _for_ me, always for others..."

"You're not making much sense, boss."

"I know!" She throws her hands up and turns back to pacing.

"But I get it." He pushes himself off the wall and steps in front of her. "Everyone wants you to fix shit for them and you need to understand everything and shit slips out of your control all the time. You hate not being in control."

"Yes, true."

"But I think you really need to get laid," he adds with a smirk.

She throws her head back in deep sigh. "I need to get laid _so_ _much_ , Bull, you have no idea." Some of the tension falls off her, now that she can finally talk about the reasons for her restlessness. "Do you know how long it's been since the last time I had good, satisfying sex?" She doesn't even want to count the weeks since she left her clan to go to the Conclave, leaving everything behind, especially her companions.

"You know, I'm always open for some good sex," he says with an inviting smile. This isn't the first time they've talked about sex and she knows what he likes although she wasn't quite so open about her own desires back then.

She puts her tiny hand on his massive chest and caresses the tattoos with her fingers. "I know what you like, Bull, and I'm afraid my game is not your game."

"I don't have to tie you up, if you don't like that, I'm open to many things." His hand comes up to her cheek, covering the whole side of her face like a warm blanket.

"I know but in my game, I want to be the one who does the tying up, if you know what I mean." She smiles up to him, now feeling a bit embarrassed to explain herself like that. Back home, it had all been so easy, her companions knew what she liked and were happy to play along. Now she had to explain everything all over again.

The Iron Bull's eyes have gone wide and understanding dawns on his face. "I see. That's an interesting thing." He is thoughtful for a moment. "Control, huh? What about pain? Inflicting it?"

"Not so much, I mean ropes can be a bit painful sometimes but I'm not much into hitting or drawing blood. I'm looking for someone to serve me, not a slave."

"Someone to serve the inquisitor, I see." The Iron Bull looks her up and down and a grin spreads on his face. "I might have someone suitable for this. "

"You can't just send some poor mercenary up here. I need someone honorable and discreet. And..." She wrings her hands as she searches for the right words. "Intelligence, I want to be able to have a conversation too."

"I think I know just the guy," the Iron Bull says and turns to go back down the stairs. "I don't know how quickly he'll agree but I'll work on it. No promises yet but I got a good feeling about this."

He leaves with a wink and Alissa decides that she might just as well get the paperwork done that Josephine had send up for her. At least then she'll have something to show when she goes to apologize to her for snapping at her.

For hours she reads the letters and the notes that Josephine has written on them, thinks about her answers and writes down notes to discuss with Josephine. With a few of them, she can compose her answer just from the notes Josephine has given her and she decides that Josephine deserves at least a box of Antivan chocolate to thank her for immense work.

The sound of boots on the stairs startles her from her thoughts. Outside, night has fallen and the candles in her room are already dangerously low.

It's not the heavy steps of the Iron Bull, that conquer the stairs up to her quarters. She looks over her shoulders to see the wide and furried shoulderguards of Commander Cullen appear over the railing.

"Commander Cullen, what can I do for you?" She closes the inkwell and places the feather in its designated groove before turning to him. He has crossed half way through the room to her but he stops now, staring at her like he's seeing her for the first time.

"Cullen?" Alissa gets up from the big chair and closes the distance to him. Her bare feet make no sound on the soft carpet but there is a metallic noise coming from Cullen. He is twitching, his fingers opening and closing, making his gauntlets rattle. "What's the matter?" she asks.

"I... I had a conversation," he says. He doesn't sound drunk but there is certain roughness to his voice as if he has used it too much. His eyes dart around nervously, looking at the candles, the windows, the chair and finally at her.

The intensity in his golden eyes takes Alissa's breath away, there is something in his gaze that she has not seen before.

"The Iron Bull spoke to me," he says in a rush, "about you. About you and..." He stops, his mouth staying open. He keeps looking at her, his lips forming soundless words and then suddenly, he falls down on one knee. Bowing his head, he says, "I would like to serve you."

Her breath hitches and she doesn't dare to hope that he means what she wishes for him to mean. "Serve me?"

He raises his head slowly to look at her, golden eyes full of hunger and lust. "Yes, serve you. In any way you desire."

Alissa can hardly believe her luck. The strong and confident Commander, usually commanding and impressive in every way, down on his knee in front of her, willing to serve her. It is as if all her dreams want to come true in this moment.

He still has his head bowed, waiting for her answer. "What do you say, my lady. Will I be sufficient?"

She places two fingers under his chin and lifts it up so that he looks at her. "Yes, I'm sure you will be sufficient."

She takes a deep breath to steady her nerves, to not appear too excited to him. Already she can feel her core aching and yearning for him and they haven't even started yet.

She walks back to the desk and sits down on her chair. "Come here. I want you to kneel down here in front of me." She points to a spot on the floor and waits for him to do what she told him. He gets up, slowly walks towards her and then goes down on both knees on the spot she pointed at. "Sit back on your heels." She waits for him to comply and is pleased when he sits back and puts his hands on his thighs without her telling him.

"Yes, good," she says. "A few ground rules, my Cullen. This will be your default position when we play this game. You will be on your knees, unless I tell you otherwise. You will crawl if you have to get someplace else."

"Yes my lady," he says, bowing his head again. "I'm sorry I didn't crawl."

"That's quite alright, you couldn't have known. As for you calling me my lady, I'd prefer if you addressed me as Mistress but you can also call me Alissa. You are not a slave, I want to make that clear." She sighs and looks to her hands for a moment. "My people are still enslaved in many places, slavery is not a game for me."

She looks back to him and gives him a smile that immediately makes him blush. _Adorable_ , she thinks. "You are free to speak at any time. You can say what you like or dislike, you can refuse any part of the game and I will respect that."

"I understand, Mistress." He enancuates the word slowly, as if he tries it on for size.

She stretches her naked foot forward and strokes over the outside of his thigh with it. His eyes widen but he doesn't move which pleases her very much.

"There is a small complication," she continues, ignoring how he clenches his hands into fists. "You are the Commander of the Inquisition Forces and that is a very different role to the one you're playing now. I want a strict distinction between these two things." She gets up to go to her bag of personal belongings at the side of her bed. Cullen turns to look at her and she points at him. "Stay there."

His head snaps forward and his spine goes rigid. "Yes, Mistress."

She has to rummage through the bag for a bit until she finds what she's looking for at the very bottom of it. She goes back to Cullen, with the leather band in her hand and approaches him from the back.

She leans down and breathes over his neck, enjoying the shiver she can see running over his body. She leans over his shoulder and shows him the leather collar with the clasp at the end. "This is a collar. When you wear this, you are no longer Commander Cullen. When you put the collar on, you will be Cullen, my pleasure servant. Do you agree to this?"

Cullen's voice is hoarse when he answers, "Yes, Mistress."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Consent discussion on blueteaparty's advice.  
> Warning for using the word penis.

* * *

"Well, then — " she stops when she realizes that she forgot something. She straightens her back and steps in front of him to sit on her chair again. "There's something else we have to talk about. I'm sorry, I should have should have addressed this with you earlier."

She looks at the collar in her hand and plays with it but when she notices Cullen staring at it, she puts it behind her on the desk, out of his sight. She turns back to him, smiling softly.

"Have you played like this before?"

"Not extensively. I have tried, but..."

"It didn't work out?"

He turns his eyes away and massages his neck like he always does when he's embarrassed. Such an adorable habit of his. "They were... professional," he says quietly.

"I see. They didn't understand?"

"No."

_He is a treasure!_

The Iron Bull has earned himself all the favours with her now, for bringing this perfect man to her.

He is like an unpolished jewel, ready for her to be formed and brought to perfection. She has to rub her legs against each other to relieve some of the pressure building in her vagina, she is so incredibly turned on by him. This masculine man, to be led willingly by her hand, to be perfected by her, just bursting with the need to serve her. A wave of heat crawls up her spine and she has to close her eyes for a moment to breathe through the desire burning in her.

"This is a game we play," she says, "and sometimes, the lines between play and reality can become blurry. That may have unhealthy consequences and that's not something either of us want."

He nods in reaction, looking thoughtful and she waits for him to focus on her again.

"When we play, we'll use a three color system to make sure that we'll don't do anything damaging. I will ask you for a color sometimes but you're also free to call out a color at any point. You will use _gold_ to indicate that you're fine and willing to proceed. _Silver_ is a pause, you'll use it if you need to discuss something and I will stop and listen and adjust before we continue. The color _black_ is a full stop. If I do something that's outside of your boundaries, you'll say _black_ and I'll cease immediately. I will not question you, I won't think badly of you, in fact, I _want_ you to use that word when I overstep your limits. I want you to feel safe at any point of our game."

Cullen nods. "Gold and black I understand. But you said I was free to speak any time but now you want me to say silver for that?"

"No. Once the collar is on, everything you do and say is part of the game. You'll use silver to step out of the game and discuss your limits with me."

"I understand." He looks up to her and smiles, his golden eyes gleaming at her. "I'm ready for you, Mistress."

She gets up, taking the collar off the desk and walks over to stand behind him. She leans down, letting her breath flow over his ear and whispers, "Put the collar on then, not too tight."

She hands him the band and watches from behind him how he tightens it around his throat. He looks so beautiful and he isn't even naked yet.

"The collar will be here in this room, it will be in a box over there," she points to a table next to the stairs, "and it will be your choice to put it on. If you enter this room without the collar, you will be just Commander Cullen but when you put it on, our game starts and you will be on your knees unless I tell you otherwise."

"Yes, Mistress."

She trails a finger along the edge of the collar, feeling his pulse beat fast under her fingers. "Will you enjoy wearing my collar, my Cullen?"

He shudders and leans slightly against her touch. "Yes, Mistress, very much."

"Good." She steps around him, places her foot between his knees and for a moment she stays in front of him, his face hovering right at her crotch. He breathes in deeply, greedily. But it's not time for that yet. She takes a step back and he tries to follow her as far as he can without getting off his knees. Oh, she loves how hungry he looks.

She sits down in her chair again, crosses her leg over and interlaces her gloved hands over her knee. She takes a steadying breath, she doesn't want to reveal too much of her own need for this man. She wants him to work for that.

"Did you lock the door when you came up?"

"Yes, I did."

"Good boy."

He blushes but his eyes keep roaming over her body and settle at that spot under her bottom where her legs are so tightly crossed.

She leans back, giving him more of a view. "Then we can begin. You should start undressing, I will explain a few more rules to you while you do that."

He bows his head and begins unlacing his greaves and pulls off his boots by putting one leg forward at the time. When he struggles with his pants, he looks up to her, a question in his eyes.

She leans forward, smiling at him. "My dear Cullen, I love your voice, use it."

"May I stand up to undress, Mistress?" He sits back on his haunches again, perfectly composed.

She thinks about it for a moment, she could enjoy watching him struggle but she has to admit that she's getting impatient. She wants to see him naked.

"Yes, you may stand up over at that chair there. Put your things on the chair and then come back to this spot."

He nods and crawls over towards the staircase to a chair next to the small table where she will place the collar from now on. His armor and coat are loud as he crawls, and he struggles with his greaves and boots in his hands, but he makes it work. His boots go under the chair, orderly side by side and he stands up to drape his massive coat over it. Next his shirt and pants get folded and placed on the seat and at last he drops his smalls.

Alissa breathes in with a deep moan. He looks delicious in all his naked glory. The muscles on his back seem to quiver in the flickering light of the fire and the collar stands out dark, almost black, against the golden skin of his throat. When he turns back to her, she can see that his penis is already half-hard, thickly jutting out of a nest of golden hair. A shy smile plays on his lips when he sees her watching and he turns deep red.

"No need to be embarrassed, my Cullen, you look wonderful. Distracting." She lets her leg slide off her knee and twitches in her seat. Her core is burning for him, desperate for his touch but she forces herself to wait. "Come back here."

He _walks_ towards her and immediate anger makes her voice sharp. "Cullen."

His eyes widen when he realizes his mistake and he falls to his knees. Pressing his forehead to the floor, he whimpers, "I'm sorry, I forgot."

She leans back, letting her anger subside. "I will let it slide for now because this is all very new but don't let it happen again."

"Yes, I'm sorry," he says, his voice muffled by the carpet.

"Now come here."

He crawls forward, his head bowed down, his nose almost touching the carpet. He knows he did wrong and he naturally behaves accordingly and she loves it. He is _so_ good. A natural.

He crawls slowly, finding his way with the pattern of the carpet. When he veers too far off, she calls him, to guide him with her voice. "Be good and come here."

Such a sight he is! How his back moves, how the muscles play under his skin. With his strong arms bowed to hold his weight, he truly looks like a lion on a prowl.

"Kneel down here." She points to a spot right in front of her chair and waits for him to sit back. He's still looking down.

"My Cullen, look at me."

He raises his head, his face drawn tight in sorrow.

"I'm not much for punishment or pain," she says, keeping her voice strict and clear. "But I will think of appropriate punishments if you make mistakes again. Do you understand?"

He meets her eyes, a touching earnesty in his look. "Yes, Mistress. I am very sorry for my mistake and will accept any punishment."

 _He's such a natural!_ She can not believe her luck.

"Some more rules," she says. She leans back in her chair and lets her naked foot crawl forward on his thigh. "As I said, I love your voice, I want you to speak often. I want you to ask questions, you can ask me anything and I will consider it, but never assume my answers. I want you to ask for my allowance for anything you wish to do, I want you to beg."

His penis twitches on that last word. It's answer enough for her.

"The most important rule: My pleasure always comes first. You will always, always pleasure me, everything you do will be for my enjoyment. My pleasure is your reward."

"Yes, please," he whispers, staring at her with desire burning bright in his eyes.

"Your pleasure is of no concern here and you might not even get to climax sometimes. Do you understand?"

She can see his erection increasing with her words, his penis pointing straight up now.

"Yes, Mistress, yes." He looks right at her, his eyes wide and his voice considerably deeper and hoarser now. "All I'm here for is to give you pleasure. Only you. That is my only purpose."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't wait, here is the next part of our subby Cullen we didn't know we needed.

Cullen loves his collar

* * *

 

"Oh, my Cullen, you are a gift," she calls out, unable to hold back her excitement. Her smalls are already soaked. 

She takes a deep breath and continues, "You will not touch yourself unless I tell you to. You will not pleasure yourself until I say that you can and you are not allowed to climax unless I order you to. Do you understand?"

There is a blink of defiance in his eyes and he hesitates to answer.

"Do you have a question?" she asks, keeping her voice soft.

"I don't know if I can promise to hold back my climax," he says. His eyes travel down her body.

She lets her knees fall open, letting him see the wet spot in her leggings at the apex of her thighs. 

His adam's apple bobs under the collar as he swallows and he stares at her crotch. "What if I get overwhelmed? What if I can't hold back?"

She leans forward. "Then you'll be punished and you will learn to control yourself." 

"But..." His voice gets a touch too defiant and she has to shut that down immediately.

"No Cullen. This is a rule and you _will_ follow it. As a matter of fact," she gets up and stands in front of him, puts her gloved hand on his cheek and pulls his gaze up to her, "I think I have to extend this rule to teach you a lesson."

He swallows, hard, and she can feel him holding his breath.

"You will not touch yourself at all, unless I'm with you and order you to do it. You will not pleasure yourself on your own, you will not climax on your own. Not when you're alone or with anyone else. You are mine, my servant, everything about you is mine to command. Your climax is mine to command. Do you understand?"

"I..." He squirms under her hard look.

"Do you understand, Cullen?"

A moment passes, he looks up to her and then says, "Silver."

She reels back her act, struggling to come down from the high of her control. Kneeling down on the floor to get on his eye level, she asks, "Yes?"

He looks to the side, unable to meet her eyes but his voice is strong. "The collar makes the difference between me as your advisor and me as your servant. You said, without the collar, I wouldn't be your servant anymore. But when you forbid me to touch myself even without the collar, you — "

" — I'm taking the game outside of our context," she finishes for him, realizing her mistake. "I'm sorry, that was wrong of me." 

She sighs. "Cullen, look at me." She waits for him to turn his head and meet her eyes. He looks worried, almost fearful and she has to remind herself that they don't know each other that well yet. They have to build that kind of trust, that she's used to having with her companions. 

"Thank you for telling me," she says. "You used the color correctly and I retract my last order."

Cullen smiles softly at her. "Thank you. I want..." He goes deep red and his gaze wanders off again. 

"Cullen, look at me. We're still in silver, tell me what bothers you."

He hesitates but then he turns to her and the intensity of his look takes her breath away. "I just want to be good for you," he says and his hoarse voice makes her shiver inside.

"You will be. I have no doubt about that," she says and strokes over his cheek. "Shall we continue?"

"Yes."

She sits back on her chair and takes in his position. "Sit up straight on your heels. Put your hands on your thighs."

He complies quickly. 

"Yes, very well." She leans back and spreads her legs apart. "Now, where were we? Ah yes, the rules about my pleasure and your pleasure. I think I would like you to repeat them for me. What did I say about your pleasure?"

He bows his head. "My pleasure is of no concern. All I'm here for is your pleasure."

She makes her voice sound hard again. "Look at me, my Cullen. What is your purpose?" 

His head snaps up. "I am your servant. My purpose is to serve you."

"Who commands your body?"

The muscles in his shoulders tense and a bead of liquid forms at the tip of his hard penis. "You do, Mistress, you command my body and the only reward I deserve is your pleasure."

Her knees go weak on his declarence and she needs all her strength to not kiss him right there on the spot. He's just too perfect. 

She steels her voice. "That is correct, I command you, I command your body and your pleasure is only allowed for my enjoyment."

"Yes, my Mistress." His voice is a song of desire begging to be unleashed. "I'm only for you and your pleasure and I am grateful."

"Oh, my Cullen," she sighs, momentarily overwhelmed by his wonderful and complete submission to her. She leans forward to stroke his cheek. "You are so good. You're such a good servant, I know I'll be very pleased with you."

"Thank you, Mistress." He closes his eyes, resting his chin on her hand. 

"My good servant, so good." She traces her thumb over his lips and he lets his lips fall open and waits, his breath coming in small puffs. Such a small gesture but it shows her that he understands now, that he is not allowed to make demands of her.

"Would you like to serve me now, my pet?"

His eyes snap open and she can see him tremble. 

"Yes, Mistress, please."

"I'm not sure if you're ready, if you truly understand your purpose." She smiles when she sees that glimpse of panic in his eyes.

"I am ready, my Mistress," he begs with a desperate whine.

She is pleased to see that he clenches his hands and moves them towards her to try to touch her but he stops himself, keeps his hands on his thighs and only looks at her with pleading eyes.

"Please, Mistress, I need to serve." His voice is low, and she can hear a hunger in it that matches her own. He lowers his head again and his fingernails dig into the skin of his thighs. "I'm your servant, that's my purpose. Please, I need to serve you."

She smiles at him. "You're very good, my Cullen, I think you deserve a reward."


	4. Chapter 4

* * *

"You really need this purpose, do you?"

He answers with conviction, "Yes, Mistress, I need it, I need my purpose."

"I want you to know that I'll take good care of you. Your pleasure is mine to give and if it pleases me, I'll make you feel really good." She takes one glove off but she keeps the hand with the anchor covered. She traces his lip with her thumb again. His breath goes hot over the skin of her hand when he opens his lips. "Lick my thumb."

Cullen's tongue drives forward, licking a hot trail up and down her thumb. He is intensely focused, eager and only stops to look up to her and ask, "May I suck?"

"Yes, and you can include the other fingers too."

Cullen dives forward, eagerly licking and takes first her thumb and then each of her fingers in his mouth to slowly suck them in. She can see the muscles in his arms twitching as his hands strain towards her but he controls himself and keeps his fist at his thighs.

Alissa gives him a soft sigh to show how much she likes his work. "You're very good, my pet. I like how you keep your hands at your sides but don't clench them so hard, I don't want you to hurt yourself."

He stretches his hands and puts them flat on his thighs. He sucks on her forefinger with reverence, all the while looking at her.

"Stop."

His mouth lets go of her finger with a pop. A thread of drool stretches from her finger to his mouth and she cleans it up with the back of her hand. Her hand is wet, glistening and she makes sure he watches when she slides it down her stomach and under the rim of her leggings. The fabric is thin enough to let him see how she pushes her hand down to her vulva and starts rubbing in slow circles.

She hears his sharp intake of air and a groan rumbles in his chest. "Mistress, please, I should do that for you."

She smirks at him and continues her ministrations, dipping her finger deep between her folds. She is so wet. "Do you think so, my Cullen? Do you get to decide how I take my pleasure?"

He shrinks down and answers with a sigh, "No, my Mistress, I do not." His impressive manhood is pointing straight up, red and leaking at the tip. His fingers are slipping towards the inside of his thighs and his whole body trembles.

She slips her hand from her pants and walks over to him. Holding her fingers under his nose, she watches his nostrils flare as he breathes in her scent. He moans again, deep in his chest and his penis twitches but he behaves himself, waiting for her command.

"Lick," she whispers, the hoarseness of her voice surprising herself.

He devours the moisture on her fingers like an Antivan delicacy, licking her fingers clean to the last drop of her juices.

"Do you like how I taste?"

"Yes. I love it." His voice is even deeper now.

She strokes over his head with her gloved hand. He leans into her touch, straining towards any contact she offers. "Your reward will be to taste me. Let's see if you can be good."

She gets up from her chair but ignores him as he strains towards her and walks past him to stoke the fire. She puts two new logs on it and waits for them catch fire. From the corner of her eye she can see that Cullen sits still, just like she left him, he hasn't even turned to look at what she is doing.

"You're being very good, my Cullen." She begins replacing the burned down candles with new ones around the room. "Your legs must be sore by now, you poor thing."

"It's no matter, Mistress." He bows his head again, the muscles in his shoulders straining.

"Nonsense, I want to know if you're hurting."

"My knees, Mistress, they hurt." His tone is so apologetic, as if it is his own fault for hurting.

"I see. We can't have that." She points to the pile of pillows at the top of her bed. "I want you to fetch one of those pillows and a woolen blanket and bring that over to the desk."

"Yes, Mistress." He moves slowly at first, leaning forward to take the weight off his haunches. Soon enough he starts crawling and Alissa enjoys watching that immensely. The way his buttocks move, muscles playing along his back and his thighs, is a wonderful sight. His penis is pointing forward between his legs, swollen rigid and it bobs down with every crawling step he takes. She almost forgets to continue her round of replacing the candles.

He puts a pillow and a blanket under his arm and hobbles back to his position in front of her chair. He halts at the exact place he has knelt before and looks to her, confused.

"Speak, little pet."

"I'm sorry, Mistress, I don't know what to do."

"Ah yes, I wasn't clear." She walks back to him and ruffles his hair which causes him to press against her hand like a cat. She lifts his chin up with her fingers and moves close to his face, almost close enough to kiss him. His lips quiver, his breath coming in pants. "You have beautiful lips, my Cullen, beautiful lips, made for kissing."

He strains towards her, trying to find her lips with his. She lets her breath blow over them but keeps her distance. "I know just the right thing for beautiful lips like this. "

She straightens and steps to the side, pointing to the area under the heavy desk. "Kneel down under the desk, facing out front, put the pillow under your knees for comfort. I want you to drape the blanket over yourself so that you not get cold, you'll sit there for a while." She waits for him to do as she commands, until he looks out from under the desk with the blanket draped over his shoulders.

He looks too large for the tiny space under the desk. His strong shoulders seem to fill it completely and he has to lean forward on his hands, lest he bump his head against the underside of the table. The woolen blanket sits loosely around his shoulders and brushes against the collar.

Alissa scoots her chair forward, trapping him even more under the desk and slides into the seat, her feet coming to rest on either side of his thighs. She watches him, looking for signs of panic for being trapped in a small space. There's always a chance that someone doesn't react well to being trapped, while others feel more secure being enclosed. So far he seems to be fine.

She takes a half filled water skin from her desk, uncorks it and holds it under the table. "Drink, my Cullen." He makes to take the water skin from her hands. "Ah! No hands. Suckle on it, like the good little pet you are."

His soft lips close around the nozzle of the bag and he suckles on it like a halla calf. With a soft pressure from her hand, she makes him lay his cheek against her thigh as he drinks in slow gulps. He looks at her as he does it, a calm in his eyes she has not seen before.

"Very good, little pet, drink it all up. You'll need it."

His cheeks hollow as he sucks out the last drops of liquid, all the while watching her. When the skin is empty, he lets it slip from his mouth, his lips open and glistening.

"Such a pretty mouth," Alissa says, "we're going to put that to good use in a minute. Now help me take off my leggings. Use your hands."

She pushes herself up on the armrests and Cullen pulls down her pants.

"My smalls too."

His hands glide up her thighs in reverence, over the soft fabric of her smalls up to the rim, where a tiny bow waits to be loosened by him. He hesitates and her arms are getting tired.

"Get on with it, pet," she scolds.

His hands are trembling when he pulls on the bow, unknotting the drawstring, and slides the soft, white cloth down over her bottom cheeks. She can hear his breath getting stuck in his throat.

"Beautiful," he rasps, "please Mistress, I... please?"

"What, little pet?"

He looks at her in alarm and she realises that this teasing is the wrong approach for him. Instead of teaching him patience, he is getting anxious, losing the calmness he had achieved a minute ago.

She takes his chin in her hand and makes him look up to her face. "You're doing fine, my sweet pet. Take a deep breath for me." She breathes with him, slowly. "And again." His broad chest expands as he breathes in, long and deep and she can see how his shoulders relax.

He leans into her touch and watches her attentively. She lets her hand wander up to his head, ruffling that gorgeous, golden hair of his. "My beautiful Cullen. You're being so good for me."

He keeps breathing in the slow rhythm, his eyes half lidded as he's watching her.

She lets go of his hair and leans back, scooting forward to the edge of her chair and opens her legs wide. Pointing to the inside of her thigh, she says, "Kiss me here."

He eagerly leans forward and softly presses his lips to her sensitive skin. She slides her finger a bit closer towards her apex. "Now here."

He follows her guidance, kissing along the inside of her thigh as she points. Her vulva is dripping wet and she can see how hungry he breathes in her scent. At last, her finger points to the skin right next to her vagina and her breath hitches in her throat when his nose brushes her clitoris. As eager as he is, she can hardly deny how very eager she is herself.

"Now listen to me, my sweet Cullen," she murmurs. "I want you to place your hands on my thighs and put your lips right there on my clit. You will not lick or suck, you will just keep her warm. Understood?"

"Yes, Mistress." His hands are very warm as he slides them up her thighs. He leans forward but hesitates before setting his lips where she wants them.

He's so close to her core that she can feel his breath flow over her vulva and it makes her quiver in anticipation. But she keeps her voice calm, even though it's a struggle. "Ask your question, my Cullen, you can ask me anything."

He looks up to her, golden eyes sparkling. "For how long? How long do I have to keep still?"

"Well," she grabs a pile of paper notes from her desk and shows it to him, "I have a ton of work to do and I would appreciate if you kept me warm until I'm done." She has no intention to finish all of the papers but he doesn't have to know that. "Can you do that for me?"

He nods, leans forward and his soft lips close around her clit. It's almost too much, aroused as she is already and her hands clench around the papers involuntarily. Josephine is going to raise her eyebrows at her for the wrinkles. Closing her eyes, she breathes deeply to calm herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wouldn't we all love this?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we are back! Someone is finally going to orgasm!

* * *

Cullen does exactly as she has told him, he sits as still as a statue, his hands warm on her thighs. His lips sit firm and hot around her clitoris and he breathes slowly through his nose. It brushes over her mons like a caressing wind.

Alissa tries her best to ignore him, pretending to be engrossed in her work but she just can't focus. Even holding perfectly still, he feels so good. He keeps still but there is a vibration of power coming off him, like untamed energy. Alissa wonders if this is how mages feel about their powers. Having Cullen here, at her knees, holding himself absolute still, feels like she has a weapon at her command, waiting to be unleashed.

She shuffles the papers to keep up the pretence, answers a few simple notes with hasty scribbles and fights to control her breathing. He feels so warm, soft, moist. She yearns to have him move his lips, suckle and kiss her clit, to lick her and she wants to watch him doing it all, wants to see his eyes as he pleasures her. No, she can't give in now, not this quickly. She wants him to kiss her, to lick her to her peak, but not easy like this. She wants more.

As she reads over yet another summary of court politics in Orlais, she lets her naked feet slip over Cullens thighs. She knows that the soles of her feet are rougher than his from walking barefoot all the time but she's certain that her feet are more agile. She keeps her touch light, stroking up the inside of his naked thighs with the back of her feet until she reaches his hardness.

His breath hitches when she draws a feathersoft line up his penis, a burst of air brushing over her mons. She spreads her toes and keeps his penis between them, just barely touching as she slides down again. A moan rises from his chest, vibrating in his mouth and through her core. He keeps still but she can tell that he struggles, quivering with every touch.

A smile spreads on her face and she looks down to him. His eyes are closed, a deep frown on his forehead testament to his struggles. His throat seems to strain against the collar. Tiny beads of sweat have formed on the hairs under his nose, and she stares, fascinated, as a drop rolls down over the scar in his upper lip. Her toes keep stroking him, soft and steady, a sweet torture that he takes so well. He keeps moaning whenever her toes slide all the way down and touch his balls but his lips stay locked around her swollen clit, unmoving.

"You're being so good, my dear Cullen, so good." She keeps stroking him, brushing up and down with soft touches with her toes. Seeing and feeling his reaction whenever she touches his balls, she puts one foot under them and rubs against them from the underside, while her other foot keeps wandering up and down his shaft. The different movements need all of her concentration, the papers on her desk forgotten. She can't focus on them anyway because Cullen now moans continuously, a deep, vibrating frequency that travels from his body through his lips directly into her vagina.

"Do you feel good, my pet? Tap once with your hand for yes and twice for no."

Tap. Only once and his fingers dig into the skin of her thigh afterwards. His eyes snap open and his adam's apple bobs under the collar as he swallows hard. He seems to become more agitated by the second, but working hard at keeping his face still. Alissa suspects that he's close to coming and quickly pulls her feet away.

She grabs his wrists to keep him steady and stands up, moving away from his face. He whimpers at the sudden loss of touch and she has to suppress one too. Without him keeping her warm, her clit feels cold and neglected.

"Sit back," she says and lets go of his wrists. He bumps his head on the underside of the table and has to dip his head to the side. His hands move to his hard penis, desperate to touch himself. "No touching, pet!" she barks at him, harsher than she intended. Her own desire and burning arousal makes her head swim.

"Sorry, Mistress," he murmurs, his voice dripping with need. "Please..."

She stands in front of him and takes off her tunic and shirt and her soft shawl. Now naked, she sets her feet wide apart and makes sure that he watches her as she lets her hands stroke slowly over her hips and down the inside of her thighs.

His hands clench into fists as his eyes go wide. The tip of his swollen shaft is leaking and he groans deep from his chest. "Please, Mistress, please..."

"Please what, pet? What do you want? Maybe if you beg me, you might even get it," she teases him.

"Let me lick you, please Mistress," he begs with delicious desperation in his voice. "Let me pleasure you, let me serve you, please!"

"You want to pleasure me?"

"Yes!" He leans forward, his hands on the floor, looking like he can barely hold himself back. Like a wild animal.

She slowly moves her hands towards the apex of her thighs, dragging her thumbs over her folds. He watches her with wide, hungry eyes, the veins on his neck straining against his collar.

"And what about you little pet?" she teases, circling her clit with her thumb. She has to force herself to keep her eyes open and on him. She's so close already.

He growls deep in his chest and bows his head. "Nothing, nothing for me. I'm just here for you, to worship you."

"That's what I like to hear, my sweet pet."

He looks up slowly, the muscles in his shoulders twitching. There is an animalistic hunger in his eyes. But he waits, he waits for her command. _He's so good._ Better than she possibly could have expected.

She stands still until he looks into her eyes, letting a smile slowly show on her face. The tension becomes almost unbearable. He still kneels under the table, leaning forward as if an unseen force is holding him back on the collar. His penis is pointing at her, hard, red and leaking, and she sees how he trembles with the effort to control himself.

With a lazy smile she sits down on the edge of the bed, spreading her legs wide for him to see all of her swollen folds, glistening wet, just waiting for him. He growls again, deep and hungry.

She waits for another breath. When his gaze comes back to her face, she licks her lips and whispers, almost inaudible, "Come here."

Regardless if he heard her or only read the command from her lips, he is like a storm, galloping towards her on his hands and knees, faster than she believed it possible. He comes to a halt in front of her, his nose a fingers width away from her mons and he breathes her in.

"Hands on your back," she orders. He clasps his hands together on his back and Alissa takes her shawl and leans over him to tie it loosely around his lower arms. The movement makes her breasts press against his face and she can feel him leaning into her. She realizes that he craves touch, skin on skin contact and she has deprived him of that so far. Something that she will have to make up for, later.

She checks the tightness of the shawl and strokes over his upper arms. "What's your color?"

He looks up to her, his bound arms restricting his movements and a dazed look in his eyes. "Gold," he says after a pause. His eyes go back down to her wet vulva and he licks his lips in anticipation.

Finally she has him where she wants him and she settles back on the edge of the bed, leaning on her hands so that she can watch him. "Now, my Cullen, you get to lick me."

The words have not even left her mouth completely, when he dives forward, his lips closing around her clit, his tongue probing her folds and she sighs in relief. He licks her with the same single minded dedication he does everything else with. Twirling his tongue around her clitoris, then driving it deep into her vagina, coming back to licking in long strokes over all her sensitive parts, she is soon helplessly moaning under his ministrations.

"Oh Creators, oh Cullen," she babbles, falling backwards as her arms don't hold her up anymore. Every emotion in her pulls towards her core, forming a tight knot of desperate desire that is blasted apart with a final suckle from Cullen and she cries out her orgasm, writhing against his mouth.

When she comes back to her senses, Cullen is resting his cheek against her thigh and slowly licks up her juices. His eyes are closed, a smile plays on his lips and the frown she has seen so often, is finally gone from his face.

Alissa sits up and brushes through his hair. His eyes stay closed but he leans towards her touch.

"Come up here, my sweet," she whispers.

He perks up but he can't crawl onto the bed with his hands bound behind his back. He still tries it though, pushing his upper body on the bed but Alissa stops him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Wait, I'm going to untie your hands so that you can crawl up on the bed but you will wait for my command, once you're up here."

"Yes, thank you, Mistress." His voice is deep and hoarse and it sends a thrill down her spine.

She leans over his shoulder again, deliberately pressing her body against his, and unties the shawl. Pulling his arms to the front, she softly rubs his arms. She hadn't tied the shawl tight but he must have pulled on it when he licked her and it has bit into the skin, leaving red marks that disappear as she massages them. He watches her intently, holding himself still on his knees.

With a kiss to each wrist, she lets go of his hand and scoots towards the headboard. "Now, crawl up here, sweet thing."

He eagerly obliges, crawling on his hands and knees towards her.

"Sit back on your heels and put your hands behind your neck." She waits for him to do so. "Now, let me look at you." She kneels in front of him, stroking down over his chest. He shivers under her touch and the muscles in his upper arms quiver. He looks marvelous like this, the muscles and tendons of his upper body on display for her, his skin golden in the light of the candles, the collar a dark band against his throat. "You're so beautiful, my Cullen."

His back straightens under her praise and he stretches his elbows out to the side.

The way he displays himself makes her grin. "Look at you, so lovely. Such a pretty sight." She strokes over his chest, circling around his nipples. He watches her with wide eyes but he holds himself absolutely still. "Are you thirsty, my pretty pet?" she asks.

"Yes, Mistress," he croaks.

There is a bottle of water on the bedside table and Alissa fills a cup. She puts her hand on his neck and holds the cup to his lips, tipping it slightly. "Now drink."

He hesitates and the water drips down over his chin and onto his thighs instead of ending up in his mouth.

"Pet! You're making my bed wet," she scolds. "I'm being very generous for letting you drink like this, I should make you lap up your water from a bowl instead."

"I'm sorry, Mistress." He stares at her, wide eyed. His penis is twitching again, and she files the idea with the bowl away for another time, it seems to have an interesting effect on him.

She holds the cup to his lips again and this time he dutifully takes the water in and swallows. Tipping the cup slowly, she makes sure that he doesn't drink too fast. When the cup is nearly empty, she puts it back on the small table and turns to him. A small drop of water sits in the corner of his mouth and she kisses it away. He strains after her mouth as she pulls away, but she grabs the collar and pulls him back.

"Not so fast." She holds the collar tight in her hand, forcing Cullen to straighten his back and stretch his neck. She can see his pulse beat under the tight leather and if she twists her hand, his breathing is restricted. She watches his face, making sure she's not strangling him for real. Her other hand strokes over his chest, feeling his nipples perk up and harden under her touch.

She pinches one of those perky nipples, twisting a little. He sucks in a breath, his head falling back against his interlaced hands and she has to hold the collar tight to keep him from falling over. The collar tightens around his neck, making it more difficult to breathe for him. That's not quite the game she wants to play with him, at least not yet, so she loosens her grip on the collar. Without her hold, he starts to sway.

"You have to hold yourself up, sweet thing," she says and takes hold of his head with both her hands. His eyes fly open and he leans forward, into the hold of her hands. His weight almost tips her over backwards. "Oh dear. It's all a bit much for you right now, is it?"

His eyes are open but glazed over and all he does is stare at her lips. His arms must hurt by now from holding them up behind his head.

"Let's get your arms down now," she says, unlaces his fingers and guides his arms down, stroking over them when they hang down his sides. He sighs as his shoulders relax and she begins to massage his shoulders, rubbing out the tension.

He sighs again and his eyes open slowly. "Mistress?"

"Yes, my sweet?"

"Can I touch you now, with my hands?" He looks at her with pleading eyes and she almost gives in.

"No."

"But I'm here to make you feel good, Mistress," he begs, "please."

She strokes over his arms, down towards the wrists. "Hands on your back, sweet thing." She waits for him to comply and then points to her neck. "Now I want you to kiss me here."

He hungrily leans forward and peppers kisses along her neck. She moans, shivers crawling up and down her spine. "Yes, good," she murmurs, "right there, that's good. Now, go further down."

He kisses over the curve of her collarbone and she moans again. His lips are so soft but his determination makes them hard on her neck. She lets her hands roam over his shoulders and down towards his chest. Tweaking his nipples causes a delicious moan from him and his lips vibrate against her skin. She decides to test something, leans forward and bites down on his neck.

His reaction is immediate and delicious, he falls against her, groaning. She gives another bite to his shoulder and he shivers against her. In her peripheral vision she can see his hard penis leaking.

"Oh sweet thing, I'm going to leave my mark on you."

He shudders at that and kisses up her neck with renewed urgency.

"Nobody will see it, don't worry, but you will." She places a kiss on the place where she bit him before. It had not been hard enough to leave a mark yet, but he obviously enjoyed it.

"Thank you, Mistress," he groans.

She pushes him to make him sit upright. "Let me see, everything is so beautiful about you, where should I put my mark?" Her touch on his skin is maddening light for him, she can see how he craves for her to get rougher with him but she barely touches him as she trails her finger over his chest. His hand comes up to her but she gives him a hard look and he snatches it away and places it down on the mattress again.

Leaning forward, she breathes him in, an earthly scent, masculine and harsh but also sweet. She licks over his nipple and he makes those delicious sounds again that seem to come from deep in his chest without any control from him.

"I could bite you here," she says and licks his other nipple. He sharply sucks in a breath through his teeth. "Or maybe here." She leans to the side and drags her tongue over his waist. His moan is constant now, an animalistic growl and there is that vibration of barely contained power about him again.

She scoots back and licks down over his stomach, almost touching the tip of his straining arousal. The scent of his precum fills her senses, a musky odor that makes her tremble in anticipation. His state of arousal hasn't lessened at all since she has last fondled him with her feet, he is rock hard and glistening. She really wants to feel him inside of her.

Licking back up his stomach, she avoids touching his shaft and the rumble in his chest turns deeper. She returns to his hardened nipple, playfully nibbling at it with her teeth. He throws his head back and bucks his hip, humping the air as he searches for skin contact against her stomach. He almost succeeds but she keeps her body just out of reach.

"How is your color for marking you with a bite?" she asks him.

His head snaps up and he looks at her with a hungry fire in his eyes. "Gold."

She leans forward, licking over the other nipple until she is just at the underside of his breast and bites down, hard.

His reaction is like an explosion. He roars, storming forward, knocking her on her back and he holds himself over her with outstretched arms, his eyes wide, panting hard.

She scowls at him. "This is not your position!" She grabs his shoulders, digging her fingernails into his skin and uses all her strength and leverage to throw him off her and to the side. He is stronger and heavier than her but he lets her manhandle him.

"I'm sorry, Mistress," he whimpers, almost falling off the bed from her push.

"On your back, arms out to the side," she orders. "Close your eyes." He complies, his breath coming in short pants. She gets up and grabs a rope from her bag and ties it to the frame of the bed. Looping the rope around his wrist, she ties him to the bed and does the same on the other side with her last piece of rope. She definitely will need more rope for the next time when they're playing.

At last she picks up her shawl and moves to his head. "Lift your head, I'm going to blindfold you now."

He obediently lifts his head up, his adam's apple bobbing under the collar, and she ties the shawl over his eyes. She can tell that he is nervous, fearful even.

She strokes over his cheek. "I'm not mad at you, I won't punish you for knocking me over."

A long sigh of relief leaves him. "I don't know what came over me." She can see that he follows every sound she makes, the blindfold making him pay more attention to it.

"Oh, I know," she chuckles. "Such a wildling you are." She caresses his chest, twirling her finger around his nipple until she reaches her bitemark. The oval of her teeth is visible as blueish lines on his skin. She didn't draw blood but she made an impressive bruise. She draws her finger around it and then pinches the mark.

He cries out, pulling on the ropes, his hips bucking.

"Shh, little wildling, I bound you so that you are better behaved," she whispers into his ear. "I didn't bind your legs but I expect you to keep your legs down and stretched out."

"As you wish, Mistress." Blindfolded, he turns his head towards her voice and she places a soft kiss on his cheek. He leans against her face, straining after it as she moves away.

She kneels down on the bed, next to his waist and kisses a trail down his chest. On her bitemark she halts, licking and kissing the bruise to sooth it. "It looks so pretty on you," she says between kisses.

She kisses down his stomach and his muscles are trembling under her lips, his breath coming in pants. His shaft in its bed of flaxen hairs is twitching and it looks red by now. She still avoids touching it because his desperation is so delicious but she can't deny that she is getting desperate too. The signs of her own arousal are dripping down her legs and she catches herself rubbing her legs together for some friction.

Climbing off the bed, she walks around it, watching him so deliciously on display for her. A soft sheen of sweat makes his skin twinkle golden in the candle light, the muscles in his arms and legs rippling with tension running through him. She can see that he's getting nervous without her close by, his head thrashing around to hear where she is.

"I'm here, sweet little pet, I'm not leaving you." She walks around the bed, admiring him and she keeps talking so that he focuses on her voice. "You're so beautiful, spread out like this. You look so strong but here with me you can let go, you can _be,_ just for me." She turns and walks once more around the bed. His head is following her voice. "You're safe here, I'm taking care of you. You have to think of nothing, you have only one purpose."

She climbs up on the bed near the headboard so that she can sit behind his head, placing her hands on his cheeks. "Tell me again, what is your purpose, my sweet pet?"

"To pleasure you, Mistress," he answers, breathlessly. He's straining his neck, tipping his head towards her voice.

She strokes over his neck and shoulders, down towards his chest, kneading the tension in his muscles. "That's right. I'm going to tell you what I want you to do and all you have to do is follow my orders."

"I love that," he murmurs, a smile shining on his lips. With his eyes blindfolded, he seems to be more unguarded, his emotions showing readily on his face.

She leans forward, continuing her stroking and kneading over his chest. "I want you to kiss my breast now."

With a moan, his lips are searching for her, kissing the air. She lowers her body down to him, brushing a nipple over his lip and he latches onto it, hungrily sucking on it. She pulls in a breath through her teeth as his caress makes a fire burn up inside of her, feeding her desire.

"Yes, very good, my sweet Cullen." She kisses his cheek as he kisses and sucks on her nipple. "Now the other one." Shifting her weight, she brings her other breast close to his hungry lips and he licks and kisses it with the same dedication.

"Now stop," she orders and his lips release her nipple with a pop. She crawls over him, using her whole her body to brush over his skin, until her vagina is aligned with his mouth. It brings her face to his crotch and she places a soft kiss on the tip of his penis. The gasp he makes and how he bucks his hips is utterly delightful.

"Lick me, like you did so well before," she says, marveling at how her breath flowing over him makes him twitch. She presses her wet core against his face, making sure that he can reach all of her and lays her face down on his stomach, facing his hard penis.

He licks her thoroughly, twirling his tongue around her clit, diving deep into her. She moans, pressing herself even more against him and whenever he hits an especially good spot, she dips her tongue forward and licks lazy around the head of his penis.

He is so deliciously reactive, gasping and moaning into her folds even for the slightest touch. It makes her light up inside, a trail of heat traveling up her spine. She gives his head another lick and presses her tongue into the slit. He moans into her, sucking on her clit more urgently, as if he can drink her in.

"Stop," she calls out, just before his licking can pull her over the edge again.

He lets go of her and whines quietly. His lips are puffy and glistening and she crawls up to his face to kiss him. He shudders as her lips find his and then kisses her back with burning urgency.

Alissa climbs up on him, using her body to touch him, taking the heat from his skin. Deep breaths help her to calm herself and she takes in his lovely scent. She kisses down his neck and works her way to the blue mark she left on him, kissing and soothing the area.

He moans deep from his chest and pulls at the ropes that keep his arms to the sides.

"Cullen, dearest, you're gonna hurt yourself." She strokes down his arm to his wrist and loosens the ropes. Then she wraps his fingers around the rope that leads down to the frame. "Pull on these, little pet, don't hurt your wrists." She leans over his chest to do the same on the other side.

Kissing back up his neck to his jaw, she swings her leg over him and sits down on his stomach. She can feel his muscles twitch under her folds and his erection poking her back. Circling his nipples with her thumb, she watches him. How he gasps with every little flick, how he arches his neck when she rubs her wetness on his stomach.

"My sweet Cullen, you know what I'm going to do now?"

He freezes, his head angling towards her voice like a bird.

"I'm going to ride you now, take my pleasure from you and you're not allowed to come unless I tell you to."

He whines as his head thrashes. She waits for him to quiet down, aligns herself with his penis and slowly sinks down on him.

"Alissa!" he gasps, his head thrown forward and pulling at the ropes with all his strength. Muscles ripple on his arms and chest. Such a beautiful sight he is.

"Shh, my sweet thing, I'm gonna be nice and slow."

She leans forward to change the angle, putting pressure on her clit and undulates her hips in a slow, rolling move. "Oh, you feel so good," she murmurs.

He throws his head back, a deep moan vibrating through his body.

She takes him in deep, making every push deliberate and slow and she watches how his head thrashes and his arms pull at the ropes. Seeing him like this, bound and blindfolded and utterly at her mercy, makes her desire draw tight in her stomach. She already feels her orgasm approach and even though she could draw this sweet torture out longer, she really doesn't want to. Moving faster, she uses his body to touch her all the way inside and grinds against him to stimulate every part of herself.

Cullen gasps, his head thrashing about. "Mistress! I can't..."

"Not yet, my sweet, hold out for me."

"I can't," he whines, "please, I can't hold it, I..."

"Shh," she shushes him and stops moving. "I know you can, be strong for me, just a little more." She holds her hips perfectly still and rubs quick circles over her clit. She feels herself tighten inside her sheath, and his hands clench around the ropes in response.

He pants, the muscles on his stomach rippling and she knows he won't be able to hold out longer. She feels her orgasm approach, the tingling tightness spreading in her abdomen and she leans forward and pumps her hips, taking him deep and fast.

"Alissa!" he cries out, his head thrashing, sweat pearling on his stomach.

She waits one more breath, feels her orgasm pull tight and cries out, "Now, Cullen, come for me!"

He roars, his hips bucking, the bed frame creaking under the force with which he pulls at the ropes. She rides him through a glorious orgasm, feels his seed inside, intense pleasure blinding her for a moment and she can't help but sob as the waves rush through her.

She falls forward, pulling at the loops to free Cullen's hands and holds him as the ripples of his orgasm make him tremble. His freed arms wrap around her and he presses his mouth to her throat, moaning incomprehensible and kissing her neck.

She pulls him tight to her, rolling them to the side and he curls up around her like a child. Tears are leaking from under the blindfold and she kisses them away. She hums soothingly against his hair, rocking him in her arms until she feels the tension melt from his shoulders.

Stroking over his head, she undoes the knot in the blindfold and wipes if off his head. His eyes remain closed and she place soft kisses on them. "You did so well, my sweet, you were wonderful, Cullen," she whispers, stroking his hair and neck. "You were perfect, so wonderful."

"Thank you," he mumbles.

She strokes his cheek. "Let us rest for a bit, move up and put your head on the pillow, I'll be right there with you."

He tries to protest, "I have to..." but she smiles and shakes her head at him.

"Later, you and I need some rest." She gets up and wipes over the heating rune on the water bowl and waits for the water to warm up. Then she takes a washcloth to herself and Cullen. After drying herself and him, she lays a blanket and a heavy fur over his body and slips under it.

He curls up again and she pulls herself close to him, wrapping her arms and legs around him. A few more tears roll down his cheeks and she rocks him softly until his breath comes slow and steady. Before he completely falls asleep, she undoes the collar and slides it off his neck, placing it somewhere over the headboard.

Tensing for a moment, he seems to want to get up but she keeps stroking soothing circles on his lower back and places her other hand on his neck, anchoring him to her body. Slowly he relaxes and when his breathing comes calm and steady, she also allows herself to drift off to sleep as well.

Waking up with a gasp, she finds herself alone in the bed. The candles have burned down and the moons spill their cold silver light into the room. She can make out Cullen's silhouette at the table by the stairs, getting dressed.

"Cullen," she calls out to him.

He turns to her, the moonlight making his golden hair look white. "I... didn't mean to wake you."

"It's quite alright. You'd rather sleep in your bed?"

He bows his head and even though she can't see his face in the dark, she knows that a smile plays on his lips. "It seems more appropriate."

"You know I don't place importance on appropriateness but I want you to feel comfortable."

He straps the breast plate to his chest and throws the coat over his shoulders. "I'll think about it, Inquisitor."

She swallows a giggle and says, "I would be glad if you could call me Alissa."

He chuckles. "When we're alone, maybe." He walks over to her, the loose armor clanking with every step. He leans down and she raises herself up to meet his lips in a shy kiss. "I want to thank you, Alissa."

She smiles at him. "It was my pleasure, quite literally."

"The pleasure was all mine too," he says with a chuckle.

She lies back down on the bed and watches him walk to the stairs. "Will I see you here again, overmorrow at night?"

His steps halt and he turns to her. The moonlight frames him in silver, his hair forming a white halo, the coat making his silhouette look like a giant. She holds her breath, waiting for him to answer.

"Yes, I will gladly make time for you," he says, bowing his head. "Good night."

"Good night," she says, a warm feeling spreading in her stomach. She stares up to the ceiling, her cheeks pulled in a smile that makes her cheeks hurt.

_Oh silly girl, you're in too deep._

It takes her a long time to fall asleep.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time for our favorite Submissive again.
> 
> Apologies that you had to wait but I had so many other things to write, Cullen had to wait for a bit.

For the long walk from her room to the war table, she has been fearing that something has changed, that something will stand between them now. But the meeting takes place just like any other.

Alissa listens to her advisors, defers to Josephine for all the pesky requests from Orlais and orders Leliana and her spies to search and infiltrate as much as possible. She is well aware that the Inquisition has many enemies and she's not willing to let them bite her into her backside while she fights demons in the front.

When she looks up to Cullen, to give him and his troops orders, he listens to her intently like he always does and is just as respectful as always. Hiding behind a cough, she breathes a sigh of relief. She has been fantasising about their next private game all morning and has started a mental list of supplies she would need. It would have been a pity if she had to give it all up because they couldn't work with each other anymore.

"Inquisitor," Cassandra says. "I'm afraid the mission in Crestwood will require your personal involvement. Leliana can still send out her spies to gather information, I'm sure we can meet them halfway but we need to find this Warden. As Varric's friend said, he may know what happens with the Wardens and where they went."

Alissa has to agree. "Yes, I see what you mean. Off to Crestwood we go. I'll get our weapons and supplies ready."

"You don't have to do that," Cassandra says.

"I have precious little else to do. My gods don't need me to sit in a chantry to pray to them, the troops don't need me to drill them, the Inquisition runs perfectly fine under yours and Cullen's watchful eyes. If I can't even prepare our group for our travels, I'd be bored out of my mind."

She smiles at Cassandra and Cullen and looks at the war table to hide her blush when she sees Cullen smile at her. He covers it quickly, scowling at something on the war table but that one moment made her heart skip a beat.

"Just let me have this, Cassandra."

"Of course, Inquisitor. When will we take off?"

"After lunch."

Cassandra nods and the advisors scatter out of the room. Cullen lingers near the door, seemingly studying the tapestry. The Iron Bull looks at him as he leaves the room and turns around to give Alissa a wide grin. She bows her head, knowing that the next round at the tavern will be on her.

Cullen turns around as the heavy steps of the Iron Bull recede, a shy smile on his lips. "So, I assume our date for tomorrow — "

" — will have to wait. You didn't change your mind?"

Cullen's smile widens. "Oh no, definitely not. And I very much hope we can continue..."

"Yes," she interrupts a little too quickly. "I'm glad you enjoyed, well..."

He steps a bit closer, they could touch each other if they'd just raised their hands. "Very much, yes."

A rasp in her throat changes her voice. "Did you sleep well?"

He leans forward, his lips almost touching her ear. "Haven't slept this well in years."

She turns her face slightly so that she can feel his stubble against her lips. "I'm placing some special orders with our orlesian trading partner. I will have them delivered to my name, marked personal."

"I will make sure that nobody else touches them," he says, still so very close to her ear.

"You will not open the wraps, you will not look at the things I've bought," she orders, her voice dropping deep. "I have so many plans for you."

His breath hitches and he takes a hasty step back. "Your promises will keep me up at night."

She looks around, finds them unwatched and closes the distance again. Raising herself on her tiptoes, she places a small kiss on his lips. "I'll be thinking of you, every night."

He gasps, straining towards her lips. But she holds her hand up and pushes him to stand upright. She lets her hand glide down his breastplate towards the increasing bulge in his leather pants, settling her palm on it for a moment.

"Every night, Cullen."

He lets out a quiet groan. "I will... I will eagerly await your return."

She turns and forces herself to walk out of the room without turning around. It's terribly difficult.

***

The anticipation is killing her. The first three nights in her tent, she almost gets off just from the thought of him on his knees. She touches herself, thinking about him, the collar dark against his throat, looking up to her, his hair framing his face. His eyes, the way he looks at her, she touches herself on that thought and comes with her hand pressed against her mouth to muffle the noise.

After that she holds herself back, doesn't touch herself. It will be so much more worth it, if she can just hold out a bit longer.

She lasts three days.

Dorian said something, she doesn't even remember what it was, but it immediately brought the image of Cullen, naked and crawling in front of her to the forefront of her mind. She almost whimpers and excuses herself early from the fire and runs more than walks towards her tent. Falling to her knees, she presses her face into her pack as he rubs herself, thinking about him and what she wants to do with him. She cries out when her burning desire is sated, at least for now.

The way back to Skyhold is long, tiring and cold and she forbids herself to give in to her desire again. She drives her troop forward until Dorian demands a break before he will explode his horse in a fit of annoyance.

One more night. One more night and half a day travel before they are back in Skyhold and then just a few hours before — she groans as her desire burns in her core. Cassandra even asks her if she is in pain. She shakes her head and hides her blush by wiping down the sweat on her brows.

The next day passes agonizing slow. The horses are tired after the brutal pace she has forced from them and the climb up to Skyhold takes them longer than ever. Or maybe it just feels that way. Finally they reach the gate and Alyssa leaves her horse with a stableboy and hurries towards the imposing walls of Skyhold. Her companions can hardly keep up.

The men and women of the Inquisition, the workers and helpers, who do all the groundwork in the Inquisition, greet her with applause and a prayer song that makes Alyssa uncomfortable, as it does every time. But this time it's keeping her in the courtyard, and she just hasn't the patience for it. She searches for that familiar cloud of golden hair, the wide, furry shoulders of his armor but she can't see him anywhere.

"Inquisitor," a rough voice behind her almost causes her to faint. His voice.

"Commander," she manages to say, her voice not quite breaking.

"Your rooms are already prepared and I ordered the maid to prepare a hot bath for you."

Alyssa sighs. "That will be wonderful, I can't wait." She waves at the crowd, smiling for them before she turns. "Commander, would you give me a report while you escort me to my rooms?"

"Certainly, Inquisitor." He lets her step in front of him and follows her into the halls. She feels his presence behind her like watchdog.

On the stairs she turns around and looks down to him, for once taller than him. "Do you have time, Commander?" Her voice sounds suggestive and hoarse, even though she tries to make it sound unassuming.

"Yes, I'm free for you." He smiles at her, so sure of himself, so very cocky.

Someone needs to be brought down a peg. Or ten.

"Excellent." She continues up the stairs. "I assume my packages have been delivered to my room?"

"Yes, Inquisitor."

She can hear his breath come harsher behind her but she doesn't turn around. Opening her door, she lets him step in past her, not looking at him. She locks the door and walks to the fireplace, and kneels down to kindle the fire even though it's already roaring nicely. She can hear the rustle of his clothes as he undresses and she makes sure not to watch him.

The sound of him crawling towards her makes her perk up. She waits for him, looking at the flames, not acknowledging him. He appears by her side, sitting back on his heels just like she does, his hands folded in his lap. She lets him wait, looking into the flames, listening to him breathing.

His breath evens out as he calms himself down.

She turns to him when she can hear him breathe slow and deep. "There you are, my pet."

He bows his head. "My Mistress."

She strokes through his gorgeous hair and lets her hand linger on his cheek. "Did you miss me, sweet thing?"

He leans into her touch and sighs. "I missed you so much, Mistress. I couldn't stop thinking about you."

"Oh, I was thinking about you too. Often." She lets her finger stroke along the collar. "I imagined you like this, every night."

His breath hitches. She keeps petting him, over his shoulder, down his arm to his hands in his lap. Under his hands she can see his penis, already hardening for her.

"Did you touch yourself, my pet?"

"No."

She halts. "Not even once?"

He looks into her eyes, burning desire in his face. "No Mistress. I did not touch myself. I wanted to save myself for you."

She blushes at his adoring expression. "My dear Cullen, you held back this whole time?"

He straightens his shoulders as he stares at her. "I hoped it would make you happy."

"Oh it does, my darling pet," she says, taking his hand in hers. "I'm so proud of you."

The praise makes him blush and his penis harden even more. She places his hands on his thighs and unceremoniously takes his shaft in her hand to softly stroke it.

"Mistress," he chokes out.

"Shhh, just a little reward. Relax, you will not come."

"But..."

"Shh." She strokes over his shaft but she keeps her touch light, not giving him what he craves. When she feels him shiver, she pulls her hand away and looks at his erection. "Such a good pet you are, so eager. You look so lovely with my collar, I think I need to put more decoration onto the rest of you." She gives him another stroke along his shaft, spreading the precum with her fingertip. "Wait here, pet."

The packages she had ordered lie in three crates in front of her bed. The wrappings and seals are undisturbed and she picks out one with the seal of a rather infamous orlesian seamstress. She carries it over to Cullen, who still sits patiently by the fire. Sitting down, she watches him as she breaks the seal and folds back the wrappings to let him see what's inside. His eyes widen when she pulls out silky and lacy lingerie in bright red.

She chuckles quietly. "I bet you think this is for me but you're wrong. These are for you to wear."

Cullen blushes from his hairline all the way down to his neck. "For me?"

"Yes, sweet pet. You will wear these and you will dance for me. I'll allow you to be on your feet while you dance."

"Dance?"

She gets up, faking annoyance. "Don't ask stupid questions, pet. You will do as I tell you and I'm telling you to sing and dance for me."

The look of panic on Cullen's face makes her regret her harshness. She changes her voice to a gentler tone, bending down to caress his cheek. "I know you will be wonderful, sweet thing. I know you can sing and it will make me so happy to see you dance in those pretty things I bought for you. Don't you want to make me happy?"

He immediately calms down, now that she reminded him of his purpose again. "Yes Mistress, I want to make you happy. That's all I want."

"Who commands your body?"

"You do, Mistress."

She suppresses a moan at his perfect answer. "If I command you to dance for me, to please me by letting me watch your gorgeous body move, what will you do?"

He sighs in relief, his eyes glazing over as he falls back into the comfort of his role. "I will do what you tell me to do, Mistress."

"And why?

He smiles at her. "Because it pleases you, Mistress."

"I will keep reminding you of your purpose when you need it, my Cullen."

"Thank you, Mistress."

He bows his head and shoulders in submission and it brings shivers down her spine. She puts her hand on his head and lowers her voice.

"These moments we have, are for you to give control over to me, completely. I will ask you to do things that you may find uncomfortable, I might do things that you won't like but those feelings mean nothing here. Because we both need this. I need the control, the power and you need to let go and obey me."

Her words have an immediate effect on him. His face and his shoulders relax. He sways and tilts against her legs, needing the support. She feels how he gives himself over to her in this moment in complete trust and that realisation floods her with a rush of power.

"You're being so good, my Cullen. You're doing so well, you serve me wonderfully."

Each of her words make him quiver, a blush creeping down his neck over his back. He slides further down, laying his chest on the floor and presses his face against her foot. Her very core strains for him, for this beautiful creature at her feet.

She pulls her foot away. "Oh dear, my feet are dirty. We will wash them first and then you can worship them." She grabs his hair and pulls up his head. "Come up, sit back."

She waits for him to meet her eyes. He has a blissed smile on his face and his eyes need a while to focus on her. Relaxing her fingers, she scratches her nails over his scalp, playing with his soft locks. He is like a soft puppy and she files some ideas for another kind of play away.

"Listen, sweet thing. I'm taking my bath now. I want you to get ready for me. Drink some water and use the oil on your chest and your genitals." She picks a little thing of lace out of the pile of soft and red fabric and stretches it out for him. "I want you to wear this, look this part goes in front, and any other piece you might like. Then you will dance into my bathroom and sing. Give it your best. I'll have a reward for you."

He swallows, a permanent blush on his cheeks but he bows his head and takes the little piece of underwear from her hand. "Yes, Mistress, thank you."

She scratches his head once more and gives him a kiss on his forehead. "I know you will be good for me, sweet Cullen. This is the task I give you, I know you'll do it well."

"Yes, Mistress, I'll try my best."

"That's all I ask of you." She gets up and shrugs out of her clothes as she walks to the bathroom. She doesn't look at him as she closes the door behind her. Breathing hard, she needs a few moments to collect herself. The way he looked at her just now, soft, trusting, fully submitted to her, it was the most arousing thing she had ever seen.

The runes inside the bathtub glow softly, keeping the water warm. She slips in with a moan, letting the warmth envelop her. Wiping over her body with a cloth with soap shards, she washes the grime of the days of travel off her skin. And she waits, as patiently as she can. She has washed herself twice already, when she finally hears a knock on the door.

"Come in," she calls out. "I was starting to get worried."

The door still blocks her view and Cullen hesitates to come in. He is standing, a dark frame against the light from the fireplace. The light of the lanterns in the bathroom doesn't reach him yet.

"Don't be shy, sweet thing. Show me how you look."

She hears him take a deep breath and then he steps through the door frame. Alissa's breath hitches in her throat. He has chosen to wear a red, silky breastband with glittering gems threaded in, the small panties she picked for him and a flimsy, see-through shawl draped over his shoulders in violet and red. He takes another big step and spins around once in front of her.

She laughs out in joy at his sight. "By the gods, you look wonderful. So beautiful."

His blush is as red as the lingerie but there is a look of elation on his face. He might not like to admit it but it looks like he enjoys wearing these things.

"Now, my beautiful, breathtaking pet, will you dance for me?"

He steps over to her, goes down on one knee and presses a kiss to her knuckles. "Anything for you, my Mistress."

He gets up in one fluid motion and in the next moment, the beautiful deep voice of Cullen Rutherford fills the small room and he dances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I could draw how marvelous Cullen looks in that lingerie.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here the continuation. Hope you enjoy! ;-)

* * *

Cullen won't give Dorian and his famous dance with seven scarves a run for his money any time soon. His dance is more like striding around, with the occasional slow turn. He works the shawl quite nicely though, letting it slip down his shoulder, catching it before it hits the floor and twisting it around his muscular arms. But his voice elevates his performance to astonishing levels.

A bit hesitant at first, tripping over the tones of the simple tavern song about the allure of a fair maiden, he soon finds his pitch and settles into his song. Deep, warm with a rough edge, his voice fills the small room over and over again. The words he sings lose all importance but the way he sings them is like a vocal caress. Combined with his sensual movements, Alissa feels like she has entered a dream. 

Her hands move down her body of their own volition, touching herself like his voice feels on her body. He watches her the whole time. When he came in, he had already been half-hard. Just as she has assumed, he seems to have a thing for the underwear. Now, dancing, letting the soft fabric slide over his naked skin and watching her lying in the soapy water, his erection has become rock hard, straining against the lacy fabric.

Which reminds her of the little surprise she has for him. 

The song comes to an end, Cullen spins around on muscular legs clearly not made for this kind of careful movement and catches his stumble in a graceful bow. 

Alissa claps enthusiastically, splashing water in her face. "That was marvelous! You look so beautiful and your voice! The gods have truly blessed you."

"Thank you."

"Come here, sweet thing." 

She holds out her arms to him and he takes a step towards her before he goes to his knees again and crawls the rest of the way. 

Seeing him remember that, almost makes her whimper in pleasure. He looks terrific, the red lace on his ass making every crawling step even more enticing. With a back and an ass like that, it should be a crime to let him walk upright.

"Come here, my Cullen, give me a kiss." 

She puts her hands on his shoulders and he leans over the rim of the bathtub, his lips softly pressing against hers. He waits for her initiative, waits for her to open her lips and dip her tongue against his. She hungers for him, she wants him right now but she reins herself back in. There is something she still needs from him and he needs more control from her.

Softly pushing against his shoulders, she ends the kiss. He goes back on his knees, holding on to the bathtub. She brushes over his chest, adjusting the breastband so that two gems lie against his nipples. With the tip of her finger, she rolls a gem back and forth over his nipple and he sucks in a breath as it hardens. 

"So responsive, sweet pet. I love that."

She does the same to the other nipple and makes sure the the gems press right on the hardened nipples, so that he feels them with every move. She gives them each an encouraging flick and revels in his choked gasp.

"Now, before you sing me another song, I have a little thing for you. Hand me that small box over there."

Cullen crawls towards the stool where she dropped her underwear and takes the little wooden box in one hand. He has to hobble back to her and almost trips on his shawl but he makes it. Handing the box over, he sits back on his heels, his hands on his thighs. A picture of perfect composure except for his erection straining against the little red pants.

Alissa opens the box so that he can look inside. "Do you know what this is?" 

He swallows hard. "I'm... I'm not sure."

"Stand up and come closer," she orders. He stands up slowly, unsure of what he can expect. Sitting up in the tub, his penis is now right in front of her face and just too tempting. She just has to press a kiss against it through the fabric.

He gasps. "Mistress, this is..." 

"Shh, you can go back to your position in a moment. Look, these things have an opening here and we just have to..." with a quick movement, she parts the fabric of his panties and guides his beautiful manhood out into the open. "There, much better." She kisses the now unclothed tip and quickly twirls her tongue around the head.

Cullen whimpers, his fists at his sides clenching.

"Look at me, my Cullen." She waits for his eyes to meet hers and takes the polished wooden ring from the box to show it to him. "This is one of my most precious toys. Made and enchanted by very skilled dwarves. I will put this on you now." 

His eyes go wide but he doesn't move.

The ring slips easily over his penis, as it should in its inactive state. She lets her hand rub his shaft for a bit, making him harder. The little gasp he makes, it's making her own center thrum. With the tip of her finger, she traces a rune on top of the ring and watches as it changes. The rune makes the ring contract until it sits tight at the base. 

She looks up, to see Cullen biting his lip. "Not done yet, sweet thing." She grins wickedly and traces another rune on the side of the ring. It begins to hum, vibrating like a purring cat. 

A groan leaves Cullen's chest and he sways on his feet. 

"Down on your knees again, my pet," she says, before his knees can give out under him. He drops to his knees, making her wince at the sound of his knees hitting the floor and she files another note away to order pads for him. 

Cullen groans, bows over, and his hand covers his penis as he stares at the ring. 

"No touching, pet," she scolds.

He looks up to her like he can't believe she's asking that of him. But he puts his hands back on his thighs and straightens his back like the good pet he is. His erection is hard, red and pointing straight up. His fingernails dig into his skin as he groans again.

"I know it's tempting, but you will keep your hands away." She leans over the edge of the tub and grabs his hard erection. "Whose is this?"

He gasps at her touch, his hands clenching as precum drips from his tip. "Yours, Mistress, it's yours," he groans, his eyes closed tight with his brows furrowed in concentration.

"Look at me." She waits for him to open his eyes and look at her. "Say it again."

"Yours, Mistress," he says breathlessly, "my body is yours."

The ring keeps on vibrating and she keeps gently holding his penis without moving her hand. "Again."

"I'm yours, Mistress, I'm yours." He sings it like a chant. "My body is yours. I'm yours, all of me is for you. My body is yours to command." The more he chants, the more he seems to relax. His eyes don't leave hers, and despite the constant overstimulation, a serene smile spreads on his face as he grounds himself in looking at her. "My body is yours. My body is yours."

Alissa has to blink away tears as her heart hurts for him. _How alone he must have felt, how lost._

"Yes, sweet thing, this body is mine. All of you is mine. I'll keep you safe." 

"Thank you, Mistress."

She lets go of his erection and gently puts a hand on his cheek to place a kiss on his lips. "You're very good, my pet, I'm so proud of you," she murmurs between small kisses. 

"Mistress, my Mistress," he sighs against her lips.

She pulls away with a smile. "Oh sweet thing, stay with me. I know you just want to let go but you have to pay attention for a bit."

"Of course," he says, glassy vision slowly focussing back on her. The ring still vibrates and she can see the muscles in his shoulders twitch as he controls his arms and struggles to keep upright. 

She traces the rune in a different direction and the vibration slows down. "I know I said that you don't get to touch any of this but just in case, in an emergency, down here is a small rune that will stop the vibrations and let the ring expand again. You just have to hold your finger on it for three seconds."

He looks to where she points and nods. "I understand." 

"Good. Now, sweet thing, you noticed that I changed the vibration? How does it feel now?"

He is breathing hard, his hands on his thighs pressing into the flesh but he nods. "It feels good, Mistress, very good. But I know I'm not allowed to come unless you tell me to."

She giggles at that. "That's right, sweet thing. You see, the ring even helps you with that. The way it sits tight around your penis, you can't easily come. It will stimulate you over and over again but the ring won't let you come."

He just says, "Oh," and stares down at the ring.

She caresses the tip of his rock-hard erection with her fingertip, spreading the precum until it glistens. "I'm gonna have you whimper in need and you will not come."

"I will not come," he repeats with a groan. "My body is yours."

"Yes, it is." She leans back into the tub, grateful that the water is kept warm from the runes. "Now I want to see another dance from this body." 

"Yes, Mistress," he whispers, a look of panic in his eyes. But he obeys her, crawls over to the place in front of the mirror where he danced before. "May I stand up?"

"Yes, sweet pet, get up and sing and dance for me."

He gets up, careful not to jostle his erection pointing straight up from between the red fabric. The ring is still vibrating and he struggles with moving for his dance. Every move causes him to shudder and his voice suffers from it. He can't fill the room this time but the breathless hitch whenever the fabric of his shawl touches his penis makes up for it. 

Alissa slides down in the water, desire thrumming in her as she watches him. His struggle with his arousal, the way his voice hitches, it makes her hunger for him even more. She touches herself under the water, stroking over her folds as Cullen plays with the shawl.

"You're wonderful, my Cullen," she moans as her desire slowly builds up. "Yes, keep dancing, let me see that body." 

He looks over his shoulder, his eyes wide. "Mistress?"

"Yes, sweet pet, I'm touching myself, because you look so wonderful. Keep moving, yes, just like that," she moans as she watches his ass. She strokes over her clitoris, massaging herself to a soft, slow height that makes her toes curl and her back arch. Water splashes over the edge of the tub as she cries out her peak.

She sighs, sated for the moment. Cullen comes to the end of his song and stands awkwardly where he ended up, staring at her.

"Go back on your knees, pet, you'll feel better."

"Yes," he sighs in relief, gracefully sitting down on his heels. The see-through shawl slides off his shoulders and he looks at her longingly. The ring still vibrates slowly and every few seconds, he shudders in reaction, almost bowing forward but catches himself and sits up straight again.

"You're doing so well, I'm so proud of you," she says, sitting up in the tub. "You danced wonderfully and I really like how you're holding yourself right now."

Even as another shiver jolts him, his smile is proud and relaxed. "Thank you, Mistress." 

Alissa gets up and steps out of the tub, water dripping down her body and pooling at her feet. Cullen's breath hitches as he watches her. She picks a towel and presses the water out of her hair with it. Then she begins to dry her body, while Cullen watches her with hungry eyes.

"Pet?" she asks after ignoring him for long minutes.

"Yes, Mistress?"

"I would like you to lick the water off my feet. Would you do that for me?"

"Of course." He crawls over to her, lowering himself down on his forearms. Bowing down even deeper, he licks slowly over the upper arch of her left foot. He switches to the other foot and also licks it dry as best as he can. 

"Very good. Now stop. Stay on your knees but up, hands behind your head."

Cullen complies, his gorgeous body stretched upwards, the lingerie enhancing his figure. The collar stands out dark against his golden skin, a mirror to the ring on his engorged shaft. 

Alissa drapes a fresh towel over her shoulders and can't resist rolling the gems over his nipples again. The vibrating ring keeps him in a constant state of arousal and pinching his nipples with her thumbs and the gems, has a delicious effect on him. He moans with every touch, fighting to keep his position.

"Very good, my Cullen." She strokes over his hair and kisses his forehead. Without any further word, she turns away and strolls over to her bed to sit down. He watches her but doesn't move, except for the involuntary twitches his erection makes. His eyes go wide when he sees how she sits down, her legs spread wide so that he can look right at her folds.

"Mistress..." he murmurs, tensing as another wave of pleasure from the vibrating ring rolls through him. His eyes close as he struggles to keep upright. 

"Yes, my pet?"

"Please..." He is moaning almost constantly now, his breath coming in huffs.

"Please what?"

"Please..."

He looks so miserable that she takes pity in him. "Come here sweet pet, slowly."

He leans forward on his hands and crawls towards her. Telling him to go slow had not even been necessary because every movement jostles his aroused penis and he has to stop every step to let another wave of pleasure wash over him.

Alissa waits patiently. The red lingerie accentuates his ass most delightfully and she bites her lips in anticipation. Just from watching him, her clitoris is throbbing, begging to be touched. 

But she has to control herself, she needs to take care of him first. She grabs a water skin from the bedside table and holds it out to Cullen at the right height, so that he can drink it as he stays on his hands and knees.

"Come here, sweet pet, drink some water. You must be so thirsty."

With a last careful stumble forward, wincing as his heavy penis twitches, he takes to the waterskin like a calf to the mother. While he sucks the skin dry, she plays with his hair and scratches her nails over his scalp. He moans at that, pressing his head against her hand.

"I know you like that, sweet thing. How do you feel?"

"I feel good, Mistress." His eyes are unfocused as he looks lazily up to her.

"And the ring?"

"It's... it's good and bad," he struggles to find the words. "It's good, it's — oh, oh no —" Another shudder makes him groan. " — it's good in a bad way. It's so... so much."

"What is your color for the ring staying on your penis?"

He looks up to her with glassy eyes. He has trouble focussing but finally he says, "Gold, Mistress."

"Very good, you're doing so well." She gives him another kiss on the forehead. "You're such a good pet for me."

His breath hitches at her words and he smiles up to her in bliss. 

She leans back on her elbows, spreading her legs wide. "I will allow you to pleasure me in moment and you will continue until I tell you to stop. You will not come yourself."

"Yes, Mistress." His voice is hoarse but he sounds sure of his ability. Much more confident than the last time they played.

"Very well." She lets her head fall back. "Begin."

He crawls forward and kisses the inside of her thigh, slowly working his way upwards. Before he reaches her throbbing folds, he halts and speaks against her skin. "May I ask a question, Mistress?"

"You may. But be quick."

"Can I use my hands to touch you?"

She looks at him, his golden eyes staring at her from beneath her legs. "You may use your hands but you will not get up from your knees. Stay on the floor like the good pet you are."

"Thank you, Mistress." He returns to his work with the single minded concentration she loves so much about him. He kisses her labia lips, carefully sucking on them and licks her clitoris like the softest delicacy. His hands search for contact, stroking over her sides and up to her chest, as far as he can reach by staying on his knees. Soon she is whimpering under his caress, falling backwards on her bed as her arms can't hold her up anymore.

Now his fingers dive into her, using her own fluids to reach deep into her while he keeps licking and sucking on her clit. She moans when he curls his finger in her, slowly stroking her from the inside, all the while his lips and tongue are driving her higher and higher towards her pleasure and he moans as he sucks on her clit and it pushes her over the edge with a joyful cry. 

He slows down, rubbing and licking her softly as she thrives on the waves of pleasure and soon she builds up again, chasing that high, moaning and panting as she gives in to his caress. His fingers enter her again but she bats them away. His tongue and lips are just what she needs, anything else would be overly stimulating. Another kiss, a quick swirl with his tongue over her clit and she comes again with a scream, trapping his head between her thighs as she crests.

"Stop," she says and turns her hip. The stimulation is too much now. He moves dutifully back, putting his hands on his thighs. She twists her body and stretches out lengthwise so that she can look at him. His erect penis looks painfully hard, red with blue veins protruding, precum sitting like a pearl on his tip. His brow is furrowed in concentration and his fists are clenched on his thigh. She can see the tension ripple through his muscles as he fights to control himself despite the stimulations.

"How do you feel, pet?"

He gasps, every breath sounding like a sob. "It's so hard, it's so much, Mistress. I... please..."

She strokes over his head. "I know, sweet thing, I know. But you can't come, not now. Let me see if you deserve it." She rolls on her back, ignoring his turmoil as he kneels on the floor, quivering with need. "You danced and sang for me, that was very good. It made me very happy. You stayed on your knees unless I told you to stand up and you waited for my commands. Then you pleasured me, most excellently. And you didn't even touch yourself while I was gone, I'm very proud of you for that." 

She rolls on her stomach and faces him. "It looks like you have been an excellent pet." She leans forward and holds her finger over the release-rune. "You did very well, my Cullen, you deserve to come." The ring stops vibrating and expands. She slides it off him. "Now get yourself off, pet, but don't make a mess."

"Thank you, Mistress," he whimpers, his hands grabbing himself with lightning speed and it only takes him a few hard tugs before he comes with a groan, spilling into his hands. And he would have fallen backwards if Alissa hadn't caught him, sliding off the bed to hold him steady as he sobs and keeps coming. 

"Good, it's all good, sweet thing," she whispers into his ear. "You're so beautiful like this, so wonderful." 

He shakes in her arms as he shudders from his orgasm and sobs in relief.

"I'm... I'm making a mess, I'm sorry, Mistress," he chokes out. His hands can't hold all of the liquid he keeps ejacuating. 

"Let me take care of that, it's quite alright." She takes a cloth from her nightstand and catches everything with it as he curls up in her arms. "You're so beautiful like this. But we better wash you, my dear." 

"I can't," he whines, tears falling from his eyes.

"I'll help you. Come up here." She needs all her strength to heave him up on the bed, he seems to be unable to use his legs at all. She arranges his limps on the bed and throws a soft blanket over him. "I'll be right back."

He curls up on himself and Alissa hurries to dip a washcloth into the still warm water in the tub and returns to quickly clean him up. Throwing the washcloth to the floor, she crawls under the blanket with him and pulls his head towards her chest. Stroking over his back, she can feel how he slowly relaxes. 

She removes the collar with quick fingers and lets it drop to the side. She also loosens the breastband to make it more comfortable but she can't remove it without making him sit up and she doesn't want to disturb his peace now. 

"I got you, everything is fine now, you're safe," she murmurs.

"Thank you," he says with a soft moan. "Alissa, I... thank you"

"You're wonderful, you were so good," she says as she softly kneads the muscles in his shoulders. "How do you feel?"

"I feel good, warm," he mumbles, his speech slurring. "So warm, so good..."

She holds him, stroking him until he falls asleep, exhausted but with a pleased smile on his face. He pulls her closer in his sleep and she turns in his arms to lean her back against his chest. Holding his hands in hers, she falls into a dreamless sleep, satisfied and calm.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks go to BlueTeaParty for looking this chapter over and fixing my newbie mistakes.
> 
> This chapter contains pain. Spanking, flogging, and red skinned ass. No blood though. Also mention of lyrium addiction and withdrawal symptoms. Alissa's and Cullen's method of dealing with drug withdrawal is not recommended in the real world.

* * *

 

The morning light wakes her early because Alissa likes to keep the windows uncovered. She loves these early hours, before Skyhold awakes and she is expected to be the Herald again. Cullen is still sleeping, his face pressed into the pillows. 

She turns on her side, resting her head on her hand and watches him breathe slow and calm. He looks lovely like this, so soft. Such a contrast to the Commander out with his troops. Strong but vulnerable, a leader to everyone else, but he submits to her. Her breath hitches as she looks at him. 

He stirs and she has to turn her gaze away. Their arrangement is not made for such treacherous feelings of attachment. 

He opens his eyes and a smile spreads on his face when he sees her. "Good morning."

"Good morning." She lays her head back on the pillow and smiles at him. "How do you feel?"

He leans over, hesitates for a beat and then places a kiss on her lips. "Wonderful," he says. Another look, his eyes burning into hers and he kisses her again. She leans back with a sigh and lets him take charge for once. He pulls her close, his hand in her hair, his tongue tangling with hers, kissing her with such an intensity that she forgets to breathe.

When he lets go of her lips, they both tremble, pressing their foreheads against each other as if that connection is all that anchors them to this world. Turmoil inside her chest makes her suppress a whimper. This connection to him, her feelings for him, are too much for what they are. And if she isn't mistaken, he also feels too much for her.

"Alissa," he murmurs and it sounds like a prayer. "I..." 

Whatever he wanted to say, he swallows it down, letting go of her and abruptly sitting up. He turns away from her, setting his feet on the floor, rubbing his neck as the cold makes him shiver. 

"It's still early, isn't it," he says, the tone of his voice too normal for the tension from just a moment ago. He fumbles with the breastband to take it off and she reaches over to undo the tiny bow in the back.

"Yes, it is." Her voice doesn't quite work yet, unsaid thoughts and pleas sitting at the back of her throat. 

Cullen shrugs the breastband off and slips out of the panties. "If possible, I would like to speak with you on a personal matter, later."

"Why not now?" she wonders aloud.

He turns to her and the pain in his expression shocks her to silence. "I can't... please, later, would you find me in my office?"

"Yes, of course." She draws the warm blankets tighter around her body, wondering what it could be that he can't address with her now.

She watches him as he gets up and walks over to the chair where he left his clothes last night. He dresses quickly, methodical, showing a lifelong training as a soldier and templar. When at last he has tightened the belts that hold his furry overcoat in place, he walks back to the bed, his eyes fixed on a spot on the floor. He leans down, picking up the collar that she discarded there last night. With a revering smile he carries it back to the table and places in the small, decorative box. He closes it carefully, his fingertips stroking the pattern on top before he turns around.

"I don't know how soon I can come back here to... to..."

"Serve me?" she finishes his hesitant sentence with a smile. It amuses her how now, when he stands fully dressed before her, he has more trouble speaking about their game. "Maybe when I see you later in your office we can arrange something of a schedule for us. I'm sure if we let Josephine know that we require private time between us, regularly, she will make sure that it happens without fail."

Cullen looks at her with something like fear in his eyes. "I'm not sure if I want Josephine to know of our... arrangement."

"I'm certain she already knows of us, nothing escapes hers or Leliana's attention." Alissa chuckles to herself. "They might not know specifics, but you spending time with me in my quarters, is a known fact I'm sure."

"Oh, I see." An adorable blush creeps on his cheeks. "Then we —" he halts, frozen in his movements and for a moment Alissa is flooded with fear that this is too much, that this is the point where he realizes that he shouldn't be with her.

He turns to her and the soft smile on his lips calms her a little. "May I ask you to see me after you've had your breakfast?"

"Of course," she says, unclenching her jaw.

Later she finds herself staring into the grain mush the kitchen has send up to her for breakfast, unable to swallow it down, even with a generous helping of sweet jam. She gives up trying to eat, the upcoming meeting with Cullen making her nervous. Throwing her shawl over her shoulders, she strides out of her rooms and descends upon Skyhold with purposeful steps. Servants, messengers and soldiers jump out of her way as she stomps over to Cullen's office. 

Throwing the door open after a short knock, not waiting for him to call her in, she barges in on him giving instructions to a few of his soldiers. She waits at the door, calming herself with slow breaths until he has send the men and women off.

"Inquisitor, what can I do for you?"

"Oh no, Cullen, don't Inquisitor me," she barks back, barely keeping her voice low enough to not entertain all of Skyhold with her outbreak. "You said you wanted to talk to me, so do it now. I'm not known to be patient and whatever you want to tell me, I'd rather know sooner than later. If this is your way of revoking our arrangement — "

"No!" He strides over to her in quick steps. "No, please, I don't want to revoke anything." His hands are on her shoulders and he looms over her. But his eyes are kind and he goes down on one knee and kisses her gloved hand. "Forgive me for worrying you."

Taking his hand and pulling him up again, she sighs with relief, a weight lifting from her chest. "Then please tell me, what is it that you want to talk about?"

"Please, sit down." He indicates a chair for to use but he himself paces behind his desk, his hand occasionally touching the rockface of the wall as if he is searching for a hold.

"You know that I was a templar and..." He makes a brisk turn, pulls out a drawer in his desk and takes out a small, simple box that has seen a lot of wear and tear. He opens it and holds it out to her. 

Alissa looks at the strange objects, sitting in a red cushion with cutouts. Inside the lid is an image whittled into the wood, a woman she recognizes as Andraste. Next to tools foreign to her, a small, cylindrical vial glows blue.

Cullen looks at the box and snaps it shut with a grunt. "Templars take lyrium, it's what gives them their abilities but it also controls them."

"It's an addiction?"

Cullen nods. "Yes. Many templars who have stopped taking it have gone mad, they've lost their will to live, only begging for lyrium." 

Alissa's eyes go wide as she begins to understand. "That's why we need a steady supply of lyrium for the former templars in our army."

"Yes, and we have that but... I wanted to tell you that I stopped taking it and it may compromise my ability to lead the Inquisition's army."

"You stopped taking it? When?"

"After Haven," he rubs his neck and begins pacing again. "I saw Kirkwall fall and then Haven and I saw everything that was wrong with the templars again and... I thought it would get easier but it keeps getting worse and I'm a risk to the Inquisition, I can't be a leader to our army if — "

"You want to take it again?"

"Maybe I should. The Inquisition is too important to risk my inability to lead our army."

Alissa stands up and stops his pacing with a hand on his arm. "That's the lyrium speaking, that's what addiction does. It will give you a reason to give in, a compelling reason, just like a demon would."

His shoulders slump forward and he leans his forehead against hers. "I will be strong is you ask me to."

"Be strong then."

He is silent, his breath heavy. Stepping back, he takes her hands in his. "I've asked Cassandra to watch me, to make sure that I'm still capable of fulfilling my position."

"I trust Cassandra, just like you do." She uses her ungloved hand to stroke over his cheek. "And I'm here for you too, don't hesitate to come to me. I can take care of you, I can hold you, or distract you, outside of what we did so far."

He grins at her, a bit forced though. "Distract me?"

She gives him a mischievous smile. "I have many ideas."

She leaves him with a smile that drops from her face as soon as the door closes behind her. Her feet carry her straight to the library, and she spends hours reading through medical journals and templar diaries. What she learns about lyrium addiction and templars doesn't placate her at all.

When the growling of her stomach makes it hard to concentrate, she makes her way down to the kitchen to find something delectable in the provisions. On the way, a messenger boy slips past her and she calls him back to her. "When you've finished your task, please find The Iron Bull and send him to the Inquisitor's quarters."

"Yes, Inquisitor, in a moment."

Silly of her to think that he wouldn't know who she is but it's still not something she's used to. Her way back to her quarters is slow for that very reason, people stop her to talk to her, to ask question and some just want to touch her gloved hand for a moment. She lets it happen, she has long given up fighting the adoration. If it gives these people hope, she can play the part.

The Iron Bull already waits in her quarters when she arrives.

"And what can I do for you, boss?"

"I need your expertise." She takes the kettle with hot water from the fireplace and begins to brew tea for them. "I have a friend who I'd like to help through a difficult phase and.."

"Is this about the golden boy and his lyrium addiction?" The Iron Bull grins with the kind of self assurance that would earn a lesser man a punch in the face.

Alissa stares up to him. "You are astonishingly good at this, Hissrad."

A shadow passes over the Bull's face before it's chased away again by a proud smile. "So what can I help you with?"

***

She hears his steps on the stairs and draws in a shaky breath. This is a new turn for their relationship and she may be in way over her head. Her hands stroke over the utensils she had The Iron Bull buy for her before she covers them with a tablecloth.

Cullen reaches the top of the stairs. She is shocked how tired he looks. She hasn't seen him for five days, only heard that he had been holed up in his rooms, not speaking to anyone. The kitchen maid, who has a little crush on the Commander, has been telling her how worried they all were because he had not been eating.

He is not wearing his coat, just a soft linen shirt that seems to be much too cold for Skyhold but sweat is pearling on his forehead. The knuckles of his fingers turn white as he clings to the railing.

"Inquisitor..."

She puts her hand on his on the railing. "Cullen..." His hand is clammy cold under hers but she can feel heat radiating off him.

"Alissa, I'm sorry," he says. His voice is forced and clipped. "I don't think I can be your servant tonight."

"I know, my dear but I think I may be able to help you."

He looks at her as a tremor shakes his body. "What do you mean?"

"I've had a conversation with The Iron Bull."

His eyes widen at that and she raises her hand. "I didn't mention you but he already knew. I don't think there can be a secret like this in Skyhold, not when you stay in your room and aren't even eating what Cilia brings you."

Cullen hangs his head and wipes the sweat from his brow. "Poor Cilia, I yelled at her last time she came into my rooms."

"You yelled at her?" No wonder the poor girl had been in tears when she had come to Alissa this afternoon.

"I have to apologize." Another tremor rattles him, his hand grabbing the railing harder. "As you can see..."

"I know, but hear me out," she says. She thinks about leading him over to a chair but she doesn't want to rid him of the support of the railing he gribs so hard. "For some people, it can help if they have something painful done to them to focus on."

"Painful?" He looks up, surprised.

"Spanking, hitting your behind with a paddle, that sort of thing. You could be bound for it, to feel secured and your focus will be on our contact, on what I will do to you. It will be painful but I think you will also find it arousing and that's nothing to be ashamed of."

The way he stares at her, she is fairly certain that she has gotten his interest.

"I will take care of you, as always. It will give you something else to focus on, if you agree to try this."

"But what about you?" he asks. "What will you get out of this if I can't... if I can't serve you."

She takes his face in her hands, placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Taking care of you, helping you in your needs is what I enjoy to do. This is the other part of being your Mistress, it is my duty to take care of my servant, to treat him as best as I can. If I can ease your suffering in any way, it will be my pleasure and all I need."

He sighs and his frown seems to soften. "I trust you. At this point, I'm willing to try anything."

"Then let us begin. Put on your collar." She turns around and pulls the cloth from the chair where she has laid out ropes, a flogger, two paddles and a nasty looking riding crop. She watches his reaction, his eyes going wide but after a breath he nods and begins to undress.

As always, she turns away from him when he gets ready, to give him a quiet moment to get into the right headspace. She carries the utensils over to the bed, places a jar on the bedside table, and waits for him with her back turned. Listening to his clothes rustle as he lays them down on the chair, there is a distinct sound when he closes the collar around his neck and goes down on his knees.

He appears down by her side, softly leaning against her leg. "I'm here, Mistress."

She can feel tremors shaking him. "Very good, my pet. Get up on the bed, on your knees, face down."

He crawls up on the bed as she ordered him but his movements look forced and painful. She strokes over his back, up to his ass in the air. "Sweet thing, there is a rolled up towel there, put your forehead on it. I'm going to blindfold you and bind you."

She waits for him to move up and winds a black cloth around his head and over his eyes. "I will bind your hands on your back and your feet to a wooden staff to keep them apart." She keeps talking to him with a calming voice, covering up her own insecurity for his sake. Already, some tension seems to slide off his shoulders. "When you are securely bound, I will give you something to drink and then we'll begin."

She winds the soft rope around his chest and shoulders and crosses it over his hands, tying them together with a few loops. She makes sure not to hurt him, crossing the rope back and around his midriff.

She secures the rope in a knot on his back and takes another to tie his ankles to a staff. She sees his muscles going slack, his back bending as he leans into the security of the ropes. "All done. Turn your head to the side for a moment." She picks up a water skin and holds it to his lips.

He suckles on it, drinking slowly. She watches his face, unguarded under the blindfold. He still has a frown on his forehead but he seems to be more relaxed already. When he stops drinking, she turns his head forward again, stroking over his hair when his forehead is settled on the rolled up towel again.

"Cullen, what's your color?"

"Gold," he mumbles.

"Remember, this is not a punishment. I'm doing this for you because I know what you need, sweet thing. This will give you something to focus on, to ground you. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Mistress."

She picks up a flogger with strands of soft halla leather and lets it glide over his bottom. "I will use this flogger to warm up your skin. It won't be much pain, I want you to relax into it. Just feel, it will be twenty strokes. Ready?"

"Yes, Mistress."

The flogger feels light in her hand and she hits him in quick succession, not putting much force into it. She can see him slowly relaxing with every hit as his skin warms up. It also doesn't escape her notice that his penis is getting harder, the longer she hits him.

After twenty strokes, she puts the flogger aside and picks up the heavy paddle.  "Now, I will use the large paddle on your bottom, ten strokes." She watches him closely, how he squirms in anticipation of the real pain. He is half-hard and the skin on his ass glows warm in pink. "You will count out each hit loud and clear. Then I will ask you your color and if it's gold, I'll give you another ten strokes. At last, there will be three strokes with the riding crop. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Mistress," he says, his voice soft.

Remembering something the Iron Bull said, she softly strokes over his ass. "Focus on the pain. Let it fill you. If it arouses you, let it happen."

"I will let it all happen, Mistress, my Mistress" he says, his shoulders slacking and his speech slurring.

She takes a deep breath and raises the paddle. "Now, count." She lets the paddle smack down on his ass with force, putting her strength into it.

"One!" he yelps.

Again she hits him, hard. He counts out each hit, his hands clenching on his back but he doesn't move away. After the tenth hit, she stops, wiping the sweat from her forehead. The skin on his ass is bright red and he is breathing hard.

She strokes over his back and his bound arms. "Very good, my Cullen, that was very good. How do you feel?"

"I... I'm... filled... I..." he stammers, panting.

She looks him over, checking that the ropes don't block circulation. He is shaking but his erection tells her that some part of him enjoys this pain.

"Color?" she asks.

"Gold," he groans.

"Ten more now, count them." She raises the paddle again and hits down with force.

He cries out, the pain even worse on his already abused skin.

"Count, pet," she orders.

"Yes, one, yes," he cries.

She hits him again, not quite as hard as before and he counts them out dutifully. She can hear in his voice that he's crying, probably soaking the blindfold.

"Ten!" he cries, swallowing a sob.

"You're so good, my Cullen, you're taking this pain so well," she says, wiping her own tears away. It hurts her to hurt him like this but she can see that it helps him. Already the shaking has stopped and the tension has left his body. "You're making me so proud, my pet, you're so strong."

"Thank you, Mistress," he says, his voice wet with tears. But his body is showing a different emotion with his erection pointing up.

She smiles at his obvious arousal and steels herself for the hardest part. This edge, where pain bleeds into pleasure has never been her thing but she can see that it works for Cullen. It pains her to hurt him more but The Iron Bull has warned her to not stop too early. That Cullen needs to be pushed past this limit to get complete focus on the pain, to distract him from the lyrium withdrawal.

Steeling herself to what she is about to do, she picks up the riding crop. "Now, this will hurt the worst. I will give you three strokes with the crop and it will be harsh. But you can take it, I know you can. You will count them out like before and after the third it will all be over. Then I will touch you and take care of you. Your color?"

He hesitates only for a moment. "Gold, Mistress."

She smacks down the crop on his abused ass and he screams.

"One! Oh maker!" 

It takes all her willpower to keep going. She smacks the crop down again.

"Two! Oh no, oh maker, no more, please," he cries, openly sobbing. He tries to move away but with his feet bound to the staff, he can't.

"Stay here. One more, be brave my Cullen," she says, fighting back tears.

One last time she smacks the crop down on his ass, but she can't bring herself to put her strength into it.

He sobs, mumbling and crying unintelligible words until he finally cries out, "Three."

She drops the crop and hurries to his side, taking him in her arms, holding him as close as she can as they both cry, tears flowing freely. 

"You were so brave, so strong, my dear pet," she whispers into his ear. "I'm so proud of you." She strokes over his back and his bound hands, following the lines of the rope that still hold him. He leans into her, crying on her shoulder.

She waits for him to calm down before she lets go of him. Carefully placing his forehead back on the towel, she positions herself behind him.

"I'm gonna put some elfroot on that now." She dips her fingers into the jar at the side and spreads the salve over his abused skin. He hisses through his teeth at her touch but he also strains towards her, still very much aroused.

"Please," he groans, "please touch me."

"Yes, I'm touching you," she says. Still massaging the elfroot salve into his skin, she strokes his erection with her other hand.

He winces as the elfroot burns but at the same time he groans with every stroke on his penis, pushing into her fist. Panting hard, he thrusts his hips forward, as much as the bindings allow.

"Alissa," he huffs. "I'm... I'm..."

"Let it happen," she says soothingly, "You can come. Let go."

He comes with a soft whine, all tension leaving his body. She quickly releases his ankles and pushes his body to fall to the side, making sure that nothing touches his bottom. She keeps stroking him, slow and softly until he sighs the end of his release.

She cleans them up, pulls the extra blanket out from under him and begins to release the ropes around his torso. She undoes the blindfold but he doesn't open his eyes. Touching him, keeping contact with his body, she massages the sections where the ropes have pressed on the skin as she unties him.

"You were amazing, Cullen, so brave. You can take anything, you're so strong," she says, repeating the words over and over and keeping her voice in a soothing singsong.

He doesn't answer but a serene smile spreads on his face. His eyes are closed and the frown on his forehead has disappeared.

When the last rope is gone, she pulls his arms forward, making his position more comfortable for him and lays down beside him. She holds the water skin to his lips and makes him drink some more.

Pulling a warm blanket over them, she puts her arm around him and softly caresses his face. "Sleep now, I'm here, my sweet, I'm holding you."

"Alissa," he mumbles, halfway gone to sleep already, "Alissa, love..."

Something pulls tight in her chest but she ignores what he said. She slides the collar off and strokes over his hair. He has fallen asleep, that serene smile still on his face.

She can't fall asleep and sometimes a few tears fall from her eyes and yet she doesn't quite understand why.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of amazed that I managed to write 23k words so far on something that I really knew nothing about as I started. I never would have thought I could have so many ideas for this. Hopefully, it's still as much fun to read it as it is for me to write it.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cullen has a purpose he has to fulfill and we know it's not his own pleasure, right?

* * *

 

 

* * *

 She hears his footsteps on the stairs, the short gap when he turns around to close the door, the metallic click of the lock and the rustle of his coat when he turns back to climb up the rest of the stairs. Her letters, notes and missive are immediately forgotten and she places the feather in its groove with a smile.

"Cullen," she greets him.

"Alissa." He looks good, much better than the last time he climbed up these stairs, even though she can still see that edge of strain in his face. His internal war has not been won yet, just one of its battles.

He hangs his coat over the back of the chair but then he hesitates. His hands are trembling and he clenches them into a fist. "May I speak with you first, before we... before we start?"

Joyful expectation fills her chest, she hadn't even been sure if he was willing to continue their sessions. "Of course." She indicates a chair for him to sit on and for a moment it looks like he doesn't dare to sit on it.

He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, as if he tries to make himself smaller. When he looks up to her, his golden eyes peeking out from under his lashes, she has to turn away, pretending to sort her papers. He looks too beautiful for words and her silly heart wants to jump out of her chest.

"I was thinking about how..." he scratches the back of his neck, an adorable blush spreading on his face, "how well the treatment worked last time."

"I was definitely planning of doing that to you again," Alissa says with a wicked grin.

"But I'm your servant, I'm here for you, and I didn't fulfill my purpose."

Alissa leans back, spreading her legs.

His eyes dart down and his blush intensifies. "I'm here to bring you pleasure, that's my purpose, not my own relief."

"Very thoughtful of you," Alissa says. "And I agree. If we are to include the pain play into our sessions, we need to change our approach." She gets up and leans over to him, placing her gloved fingers under his chin. "I'm glad you came to me right away with this because I already prepared something and I would like to hear your opinion."

She kisses him softly and then walks over to the side of the bed, pulling a cloth away from a boxy shape against the wall. "This will be your spanking bench. You see there is a little padding here for you to kneel on and you'll lean over here."

Cullen swallows in a loud gulp. "You had this made?"

She smiles at him. "Actually no, it's old, a good old prayer bench. Surprisingly similar to what I had in mind and I found it in the basement." She strokes over the soft halla leather. "I fixed it up myself over the last few days. I always liked working with leather."

Cullen is sitting on the edge of his seat, his eyes wide. The occasional tremor still makes him frown but his attention is all on her and the bench. "So, how will this work?"

She returns to her chair, crossing her legs as she leans back. "Just like always, you undressing and putting on the collar is the begin of our play. You will then crawl over to the bench, kneel on it in position, and wait for me there. There will be no talking until I acknowledge you. You will use the time to calm yourself down through deep breathing."

His breath has gotten faster and he keeps staring at the bench.

"When I come to you and call you by your name, you will ask me to be spanked."

"How will I do that?"

"How about 'I need my spanking, Mistress. Please give me my pain to ground me.' Would that work for you?"

Cullen's eyes are wide and full of hunger. "Yes." It's more a growl than an actual word.

Alissa hides her pleased grin by stepping back to the bench. Making sure he watches her, she lets a thick leather band with holes and a buckle slip through her hand. She shows him by pulling on it, that it has been fixed to the side of the bench. There's four of these leather bands. "These are for tying your arms and legs to the bench, we'll see how well that works for you, you might get more out of it if you're not restrained." She goes back to her chair and sits. "Do you have any questions?"

"How many?"

"How many strokes?"

He nods.

"I will decide that as how I think you need it. I will always start with the flogger and then increase the pain until I decide that you're done."

He shifts in his seat, playing with the buttons on his shirt. "And after that?"

She smiles at him. "Oh, very simple. I will tell you what to do."

He visibly relaxes on that. It makes her heart warm to see how wonderfully he trusts her.

"You will have a moment's rest to collect yourself but then... you know why you're here."

"Yes."

She gets up, stepping behind his chair, her ungloved hand stroking over his cheek. He leans into the touch, his eyes closing. She watches him, this powerful man, soft and trusting in her very hand and she relishes the surge of power warming up her spine.

"We'll keep things simple the first few times, spankings and then your duty as my servant. You will not orgasm. I want you to settle completely into your role, ignoring your own wants and only serve me, as is your purpose." A soft groan comes from him, his lips opening. She leans over and places a soft kiss on those gorgeous lips. "Later on, I'd like to add some more fun things to our play but for now, I think you need a simple routine to settle in. If possible, I want you here every night at the same time."

"Yes, I... yes," he stammers, leaning more against her hand as if he has trouble to keep upright on his own.

"Let's get started then." She steps away from his chair and goes back to her desk, making sure her back is turned to him. It hides her face from him, the embarrassing flush of her cheeks and how she just wants to stare at him like a smitten little girl. With deep breaths, she settles back into herself, calling up her power inside. She loves this rush, this powerful feeling of dominance, the thrill of expectation, the freedom to do what she wants with this man.

From the rustle of his clothes she knows that he's undressing quickly and she watches out of the corner of her eye how he places the last bit of clothing orderly on the chair. Next, he opens the small box with his collar and just stares at it lovingly for a moment. Then he goes down on his knees and wraps it around his throat. His eyelids lower as he closes the buckle and for a moment he just stands on his knees, feeling the collar under his fingers and breathes. She is fascinated by this, how he seems to have his own, loving ritual with his collar.

When he lowers himself on his hands, his gaze snaps to the prayer bench and he takes a shuddering breath. He crawls over to it, carefully putting his weight on the knee bench and then leans his chest over the upper part. He eyes the leather straps next to his upper arms suspiciously and grabs the lower part of the bench's legs. She can see the muscles playing on his back as he tests the strength of the construction.

She chuckles and waits. He fidgets for a while but then settles in one position and begins to breathe slower. She waits a bit more to let him calm himself and walks over. Placing her hand on his back, she says, "Cullen, my sweet pet."

He swallows and his voice is strained. "Mistress, please spank me. I want... I need the pain to ground me, please give me my spanking."

"Will you be ready to serve your purpose afterwards?"

"Yes, I will serve you in any way, Mistress."

"And what about yourself?"

"My body is yours to command. My purpose is to bring you pleasure," his voice goes into the soft sing-song of a chant again, like his personal prayer. "My body is yours, it has only one purpose."

"Good." She keeps her voice hard, factual, trying to no let her joy about his wonderful behaviour spill into it. "I will blindfold you now and tie your arms and legs to the bench. Then you will get your spanking. Afterwards, you will rest on the cushion I put in front of the bed for you and then I will use you in any way I want. What is your color?"

"Gold." His breath has quickend but his answer was sure and immediate.

Alissa wraps the blindfold over his eyes, closes the clasps over his upper arms and uses two soft ropes to tie his wrists to the lower part. She nudges his legs further apart and closes the leather straps just under the back of his knees.

Taking the flogger, she swings it around to loosen the strands of leather. "I begin with the flogger, to warm up your skin." She smacks him, carefully at first, then harder. His skin turns a lovely pink. She keeps a slow rhythm and his breath adjusts to it.

After twenty strokes, she puts the flogger away and picks up the paddle, weighing it in her hand. "That was very good, my sweet. Now the paddle, ten strokes. You will count them out, loud and clear."

She strikes down and he yelps.

"One."

She strikes again, harder and quickly, and he counts out each hit dutifully. His breath is coming quicker and she can hear in his voice that the pain gets to him but it's not nearly as bad as she thinks he needs. After the tenth hit she pauses, watching the skin on his bottom turn bright red.

"Another ten, count them." She hits him hard, putting her strength into it.

"Oh Maker, one," he cries out.

She hits him in quick succession, hearing his voice getting wet as his emotions overwhelm him. He squirms on the bench but the restrains hold him securely. His penis, which had at first been dangling down, soft and innocent, now begins to harden with every hit and cry.

"Ten!" he sobs, pulling at the restraints.

She strokes over his bend back. "Don't fight it, sweet pet. Let the pain fill you."

"I'm sorry, I'm trying," he mumbles.

Recalling everything the Iron Bull has told her, she readies the paddle again. "I'll give you another ten strokes. Let the pain in, give in to it. And don't worry if it arouses you, you will never be punished for your arousal."

"Thank you, Mistress."

"My pleasure. No matter what happens, you will not come today so you can let that worry drop from your head. Remove yourself from this body, it is not your own anymore. It's mine, it's just a tool for me. I will use this tool in any way I like, I will tell this body what it has to do and it will do it. You will just listen to me."

The longer she speaks, the softer his body seems to get. He sinks into the binds, his muscles going slack, his mouth open as his jaw unclenches.

"Ten more, count them for me, pet."

She hits him in a slow and steady rhythm and as he counts the hits, his voice gets calmer. She can see that he's crying but there is no tension, no gasping. It's a complete surrender to the pain.

"Wonderful, you're being so good, my sweet, sweet pet," she says after the tenth hit.

"Ten," he sighs, "thank you." His erection is straining upwards, precum glistening on the head.

"I think this body can take five more and then it needs some rest."

"Yes, it can take that, because my body is yours," he mumbles, words blurring into each other. "My body is yours, my body is yours."

She hits him slow and steady and he keeps his chant up with his counts.

"One, my body is yours, two, my body is yours," he's sobbing now but he's not trying to get away from the pain, his whole body slack on the bench. "Three, my body is yours, four, my body is yours, five, my body is yours."

"Well done. You were wonderful, so strong." She sets the paddle to the side and rolls her shoulders. This kind of exercise is definitely a new strain on her muscles that she will have to get used to. But seeing how good it is for him, how well he sinks into it, she gladly puts up with it. She will have to thank the Iron Bull again for his great advice, Cullen takes to the spanking like he is made for it.

She leans over his body, careful not to touch his abused bottom, takes the blindfold off and frees his arms and legs from the binds. She has to help him down, he can't even hold his head upright. He's slumping against her and she tries to drag him over to the cushion on the floor. She shakes her head, she should have thought this through first, he is way too heavy for her to carry him anywhere, even the few steps to the cushion.

"Cullen, I can't carry you, you have to keep on your hands and feet and crawl over there to the cushion, see? It's only a few steps."

His eyes are unfocussed but he crawls in the direction she pointed and soon finds the soft cushion under his hands. He practically collapses onto it and Alissa sighs again. Another thing she should have told him instructions about beforehand. She grabs a water skin and kneels beside him.

"Cullen, sweet thing, you were great, perfect but you can't just lie like this, we have to get you in a good position. First of all, have a drink, come here." He raises himself up on his arms, settling back towards his feet and winces when his heels touch his bottom. "That's not a good idea, yet. Lean forward, on your arms, and raise your behind. There you go." She puts the waterskin to his lips and lets him suckle on it until it is empty.

"Now, put your hands in front of you and place your cheek or your forehead on it. Let your chest go as low as it is comfortable, stretch your back and present your beautiful bottom to me. Place your knees further apart."

He does as he's told and his whole back just sacks with a beautiful bend. She strokes up his spine, from his shoulder blades up to his ass. "Beautiful, you're doing so well. I'm going to put the salve on you now."

He hisses through his teeth when the salve touches his red skin but he keeps his position. "Very good, my Cullen, stay like this." She strokes over his red butt cheeks. His penis is not quite as hard anymore but the more she works the salve in, the harder it seems to get.

"Alright, all done. I want you to change your position. Put your knees even further apart, scoot back, put your hands closer and put your forehead on them. Now settle down, rest." He rolls up and she can see how relaxation flows through him. "This will be your resting position from now on. Whenever you have to wait for me or I'm telling you to rest, you will place yourself like this on the cushion. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Mistress." His voice is muffled but steady.

"Rest, until I call on you."

She kneels next to him and watches him. His breath is calm, his back is round and his shoulders look soft and relaxed. His mouth is open, he's drooling a bit. He probably is about to fall asleep like this.

Giving him some more time, she takes off her tunic, leggings and shoes and loosens her breastband. She tries to be patient but he looks just too delicious and she is not willing to miss out on her own satisfaction again. She sits down on the edge of the bed and calls out to him.

"Cullen, sit up." She makes her voice hard, letting it sound like a military order. He stirs and she calls louder to him. "Cullen, pet, sit up."

"Yhehng, yes, Mistress, yes," he stammers, sitting up quickly. When his butt cheeks hit his heels, he flinches. He blinks, looking around disoriented and it's so adorable that Alissa has to smile.

"Oh sweet pet, come here, let me hold you." She spreads her arms and he crawls forward until he sits between her legs and rests his head on her stomach. "Hello, sweet thing, are you back with me?"

"Yes, I..., you smell so good," he mumbles into her skin.

It tickles and causes her to make very embarrassing snorting noises. "Oh, ah, that tickles."

Which spurs him on even more and he snuggles his nose deeper into her stomach.

"Ahhaha, oh you wicked little thing."

"So soft, want to stay here forever," he murmurs into her skin.

She squirms away from him and laughs. "That's all well and good but if I you don't get your tongue on my special flower soon, I might have to look for a new servant."

He stares up to her, shocked for a moment, but relaxes when she smiles at him. "Of course, Mistress."

Deft fingers take off her smalls and then he kisses up the inside of her thigh. He advances on her with quiet reserve, lips nipping at her skin, soft, even a bit hesitant. But when he reaches her labia lips, he finds his usual determination again, kissing, licking, sucking her so wonderfully that she is soon a squirming, panting mess under his lips.

"Yes, more," she sobs, falling backwards, helplessly caught in that hot spiral of ecstasy radiating out into her mind. Without hardly any buildup she comes on his tongue, her body tensing, her back arching and she doesn't have enough breath to scream.

As she sinks back down, trying to catch up to the receding waves, he slows his movements, kissing her softly around her clitoris but not directly. Oh, he knows her by now, he has learned her well.

"My sweet Cullen, that was fantastic," she sighs. Raising herself up on her elbows, she looks at him between her legs. His eyes are closed as he keeps kissing and licking her labia, drawing the tip of his tongue in a wide circle around her clitoris before dipping deep into her.

A new wave of desire thrums up her pelvis. "Yes, sweet thing, make me come again, drink what I give you."

"Yes, thank you, Mistress," he mumbles before diving back into her, his tongue and his lips a grounding force against the burning need of her body. She watches him, the focussed dedication on his face and he has never looked more beautiful.

He licks her slowly, finding sensitivity in places she didn't even know about. She can tell that he listens intently for her reactions, adding another firm lick for every gasp she makes and with impressive precision he makes her desire burn through her body again.

She leans forward to grab his hair and shove him harder against her center. Her heels dig into his back as she rushes towards her fulfilment, waves of ecstasy crashing over her until she finally falls over the edge with a scream.

"Stop," she sighs out with her last moan, letting the tension flow out of her body. "Mythal'enaste, Cullen, that was excellent, wonderful. You did so well."

She sits up to look at him. He still kneels at her feet, his cheek leaning against her thigh and he hums softly. She strokes over his head, letting the golden strands slip through her fingers. "So good, my sweet, such a good pet you are."

He leans heavily against her, he seems to have trouble to keep himself upright.

"Wait, my sweet, let me hold you." She slips off the bed onto the floor and leans against the bedframe. Pulling a blanket over them, she pulls him towards her, his back against her chest and his head flopping back onto her shoulder. She strokes along the collar, which now stands out on his stretched neck, dark and beautiful.

"You were wonderful, so good." She strokes over his arms, chest and stomach, ignoring his erection. He is still aroused but she can see that it's already receding. He doesn't need it, doesn't ask for his satisfaction.

He has truly submitted. All he needs is to fulfill her wishes. He's clearly floating, relaxed, the pain on his bottom either forgotten or he might even relish the soft burn of it.

What a treasure he is, so perfect, so good for her, she loves...

Banishing the thought, she focuses on him again, holding him tight to her, stroking over the collar. "You're so good, my sweet, you make me so happy."

"I'm a good pet," he mumbles with a shy smile.

"Yes, you are, the best."

"Thank you, for letting me be that for you." His eyes are clear when he turns to look at her. "Alissa, I... I never thought I could find someone like you, who... who understands me."

"I'm very glad about that too, I really..." she has to look away, she feels like he's looking straight into her heart. "You give me so much, you are so important to me."

He curls up in her arms, as best as he can. "I wish I could stay here, like this, forever."

She tightens her arms around him, trying to calm her rapidly beating heart. "I wish you could. You can stay as long as you like."

"I should let you get some sleep."

"In a moment, let me hold you some more,"

"Thank you," he mumbles.

She can feel him relax in her arms and pulls the blanket over his shoulders.

Her treacherous heart keeps beating in time with his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this wasn't boring, I have some fun stuff planned for the next chapters.


	10. Chapter 10

She sits at her desk when the door claps and the lock shifts into place. Alissa holds her breath. They have settled into a comfortable routine. Her duties call her away sometimes but each night she stays in Skyhold, he comes to her when the castle settles down for the night. She doesn't have to look over her shoulder to see how he feels, she can tell by the way he climbs up the stairs by now. Tonight his steps are light and quick.

She lets out a sigh of relief; the last four nights had been taxing. After initially responding so well to the spankings grounding and calming him, four nights ago he had a horrible relapse. A potion he took had been laced with Lyrium and his body reacted violently to it. He was suffering so terribly that she couldn't bring herself to use him like she had intended. She bound him, gave him his spankings and made him rest on his pillow but then she ordered him just to let her hold him tight in her bed as they fell asleep.

Not that she slept much. Cullen's sleep had been restless those last four nights, he was shivering and plagued by nightmares. She had dodged his flailing arms a few times, had to wake him up before he could hurt himself or her. It broke her heart to see him like this.

But tonight she is hopeful that things will work out better. She turns to see if he wants to speak to her first, before he slips into his role. He gives her a shy smile and bows his head.

"Good evening, Alissa," he says.

"Good evening, anything you want to discuss, before we begin?"

"Not now," he says, "but after I have prepared myself, I would like to ask you something, if I may."

"Alright, I let you get ready then." She turns back to her writing, formulating a rough draft of a letter to the king. Josephine will work it over, making it sound more appropriate, but the general gist has to come from her. While she writes, she hears Cullen undressing. When it gets very quiet, she looks over to him.

He is naked, holding the collar in his hand and slowly goes down on one knee. When he puts it around his neck, his eyes close and he lets out a long, slow breath. He sits back down on his heels, his hands flat on his thighs and with his eyes closed, he just breathes. She can see the tension falling from his shoulders as his chest moves with deep breaths.

As she watches him, she feels how her own tension leaves her. His calm acceptance of his role, the way he settles into himself, it has the same calming effect on her.

When he opens his eyes and catches her watching him, he smiles. She can't help but smile back at him, she is overjoyed to see that he feels better. He crawls over to the prayer bench and she waits for him to settle in his position before she goes over to him. Her naked feet are noiseless on the carpet and he flinches when she puts her hand on his back.

"I'm here, Cullen."

"Mistress," he says and it sounds like a sigh of relief.

"What did you want to talk about, my pet?"

He hesitates for a moment. "I want to ask you for my spanking but I think I need more. I need to be punished."

Alissa kneels down so that her face is at the same height as his. "Cullen, look at me." She waits for him to turn his head and he looks at her with wide eyes. "Tell me, why do you think you need to be punished?"

"I failed you, Mistress," he rushes to say. His hands tighten around the legs of the bench. "I failed you as your servant, I didn't fulfill my duty to you."

She can see the guilt practically radiating off him. "Cullen, dear, none of that was your fault. How could I punish you for being sick?"

"But I failed you."

"Oh Cullen," she prys his hand away from the bench leg and pulls it up to her mouth to kiss it. "You could never fail me. You are wonderful in your obedience to me. I only expect you to follow my orders when you are well and able to."

"But I should have been stronger."

"I decide how strong you have to be." She studies his face, sees the guilt eating away at him. "But I see that you need something."

"Please, Mistress," he pleads.

She doesn't like handing out punishment, especially not for something like this, when the drug withdrawal has made him suffer. But she can see that he needs a resolution. He needs to know that he's forgiven.

"Here's what I will do. I will give you your grounding spanking like always and then I will give you eight strokes with the riding crop. That will be your punishment. You will accept those strokes and thank me for them afterwards. After that, all is forgiven. Understood?"

"Yes, thank you Mistress." He sighs, his shoulders sinking as he relaxes.

"Good, then let us begin." She straightens and puts her hand on his back again. "I'm here, my pet."

He lets out a shuddering breath but his voice is strong when he speaks. "Mistress, please give me my spanking to ground me and please punish me for my failure in serving you."

Alissa takes a black shawl and stretches it between her hands. "I'm going to blindfold you now and then I'll tie your arms and hands to the bench. What is your color?"

"Gold," he says with a breathy sigh.

Securing him to the bench is a work of moments and then she steps back to admire the view. "You look so beautiful, sweet pet." She picks up the flogger and strokes softly with it over the stretched skin of his pretty round buttocks.

"Count, sweet pet." She hits him in quick succession, twenty times. He counts them dutifully, concentration making his voice tight. He seems to have trouble to let himself go under.

She switches to the paddle, weighing it in her hand. "Count, pet."

"Yes, Mistress."

She hits him, twenty times again, finding a steady rhythm and he counts them dutifully. Over time, his voice becomes loose, as he relaxes into the pain. She gives him something to drink and then adds another ten strokes. With every hit, he seems to sink deeper into the bench and counts the hits, slightly slurring his speech. Even as he begins to cry, he still counts every hit.

The skin on his ass has turned a delightful pink and she can see that he's crying but it doesn't bother him. His body tells her how he feels and she watches him closely to gauge his needs. The way he hangs in the restraints, relaxed, calm, trusting, tells her more than any words from him could.

She holds the waterskin to his lips. "Have another sip of water and then we'll get to your punishment."

He drinks eagerly and she wipes his mouth afterwards. "Thank you Mistress," he says, his voice deep and hoarse. "Please give me my punishment so that I may be forgiven."

Her heart gives a painful pinch in her chest as she hears that. She wants to banish this guilt from his mind and if the punishment is what it takes to do that, she will, whether she likes it or not. She picks the riding crop up and lets it swing through the air; it whistles and he flinches on hearing it. "Eight strokes, my Cullen, and then all will be forgiven. Count them."

Taking a deep breath, she swings back and hits him hard.

"One!" he yells.

She gives him time to feel the pain, waits until he has taken a breath before she hits him again, the crop whistling sharply.

"Two," he cries out.

With every hit he cries more, wrenching deep sobs from his body. On the last hit, he can barely speak, but his crying turns into relieved laughter. "Ei.. Eight... thank... thank you, Mistress," he stammers between gulps of breath.

She releases his bonds quickly and puts her hand on his neck. "Go to your rest, pet."

Guided by her hand on his neck, he crawls to the pillow and kneels down, resting his forehead on his folded arms. She stays with him, stroking over his back, softly speaking to him, and waits for him to stop crying. When he is breathing calmer, she undoes the blindfold and begins to apply the salve to his abused skin.

"That was very good, my pet, very good."

"Thank you, Mistress." He flinches when she touches the raw welts to spread salve over them but he holds himself still in position. He is aroused but as always they ignore it.

"All is forgiven now, my sweet pet."

"Yes," he whispers and she can hear him smiling.

She cleans her hands and lets her finger glide down his spine. "How do you feel?"

"I feel good." There is that softness in his voice that he always gets when he has truly gone under, when he's floating on that edge between pleasure and pain. It's incredible to see and hear and it gives Alissa a rush of power.

 _He is so open now, soft and vulnerable. Such an incredible gift_.

In this vulnerable state, she needs to give him all the skin contact she can. She shrugs out of her tunic, wraps her arms around his shoulders and presses her lips to his neck right under the collar. "My sweet Cullen, you are so wonderful. I'm so proud of you."

"Thank you, Mistress."

She kisses his neck again. "Are you ready to serve me now?"

"Yes, Mistress, I want to serve you."

She gets up and takes a step back, giving herself a moment to admire the bend of his back. "Sit up."

He straightens his back, sitting back on his heels with his hands on his thighs and looks at her.

She turns and walks over to her desk. Leaning against it, she slips out of her leggins and spreads her legs wide for him to see. He watches her, his eyes wide and he swallows hard.

"You look beautiful," she says. "Your body is mine and here's what I will do with it." She strokes over her stomach down to her mons, dipping her finger into her folds. "First, you're going to lick me."

He swallows again at that and stares at her folds with hungry eyes.

"Then — " she points to the bed's headboard, " — do you see those bands there? I'm going to tie you up there." She circles her clitoris with her finger and gasps softly. "And then I'm going to use you." She raises her foot onto the desk to stretch herself wider, letting him see her more intimately. "You body is mine, I will use it however I like."

"Yes, Mistress," he whispers, licking his lips as he stares at her.

"Come here, pet."

He crawls over to her, a dreamy smile on his lips.

She leans back, putting more weight against the desk. "Put your hands on my thighs. Are you feeling alright?"

He kneels between her legs, his hands grabbing thighs and looks up to her with half-lid eyes. "Gold, Mistress," he whispers.

She can feel his weight shifting, he leans on her. "Now, ask me."

He seems confused for a moment but then he smiles. "Please, Mistress, may I pleasure you?"

"Yes. Do it well and I might reward you later."

He dives forward, pressing his nose against her mons.

She leans back on her elbows and sets her legs wider. "Go slow and soft."

He obliges, his lips the softest caress, his breath stroking over her. His tongue glides over her labia, slow and warm, long licks like she loves them.

She moans, "Oh yes, you know what I like. Do it again like that."

Another lick, the tip of his tongue just barely dipping into her and then he strokes in a slow caress forward over her clitoris. She gasps, lifting her hips to press closer to him. "Oh, you're so good, so good. Now go a bit faster."

He follows her order, his tongue making a swift turn around her thrumming clit before he repeats his former path, only faster. She can't help but squirm, he's so good at this and she feels that familiar pressure build up inside of her with every stroke of his tongue until he suddenly slows down again. It still feels good but it's not enough.

"Didn't I say faster?"

He hums at that and even if she can't see his mouth, she knows that he is grinning.

"Oh, are you trying to tease me?" She grabs his hair and pulls his head back hard. Oh yes, he's grinning mischievously. "You wicked little thing," she says, unable to fight her own smile. "Such bratty disobedience. Do you think this is how you earn yourself an orgasm?"

His eyes go wide in surprise at that. Apparently he hasn't been aware that this was an option. She has denied him his orgasms for so long, he seems to have accepted the he won't get one.

She shoves his face into her crotch. "Now, faster, lick and suck."

"Yes, Mistress," he mumbles, setting his lips on her clit and carefully sucking on it.

"Creators, yes!" she cries out. "Yes, more, and hum for me."

He doubles his efforts, licking her, dipping his tongue into her and when he adds the deep vibrations of his voice as his lips tug on her clitoris, she loses all sense of time and place.

The pulsing in her core becomes almost unbearable, she yearns, she cries for the breaking wave that hovers just in reach, just a bit more, she needs just a little bit more.

"Yes, oh Vehnan, yes, like that, yes," and finally, the towering wave crashes over her and she screams her release. She curls up, clenching her fists into his hair to hold him at her bucking hips, to force him to never stop as pleasure rushes through her.

As the wave ebbs, she softly pulls him back by his hair and uncurls her fingers. He leans against her thigh, his eyes are closed and he still hums to himself.

She cards through his soft locks. "That was fantastic, my Cullen, wonderful."

"Thank you, Mistress."

"No, thank _you_ , sweet pet. You give me so much, I can hardly believe it."

He opens his eyes a little, looking at her through his lashes with a relaxed smile. "I love... I love serving you," he murmurs. His eyes close again and he leans more heavily against her leg as she keeps softly scratching his scalp. She can see that he's aroused, precum glistening on the tip of his penis. But he isn't touching himself and he's not trying to rub against her or anything like that.

Alissa strokes her fingers down his neck. "How long has it been since I allowed you to come?"

His eyes remain closed when he answers and his voice is soft. "We've had 11 sessions, Mistress, but it has been 18 nights since you last allowed me to come."

"That long? And how do you feel about that?"

"It doesn't matter, Mistress. My body is just a tool for you, it has no needs. My body is yours."

"I love it when you say that." She rubs her thumb over his lips. "You are mine."

"Yes," he whispers.

She grabs his chin and pulls his head up, sliding a finger under the collar and yanks him up to her. "Mine."

A shudder goes through him and he stares at her with wide, hungry eyes.

"Now," she whispers, "this body better get on the bed so that I can use it however I like."


	11. Chapter 11

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Cullen crawls over to the bed, muscles quivering on his back, his erection pointing up and forward. She waits by her desk, watching him. He is a delicious sight. There is a grace to his movements that she has not thought possible for someone this large, who crawls. When he reaches the bed and raises his torso to climb onto it, she has to bite her lip to stop herself from moaning. The way he stretches up, one foot still on the floor, his leg stretching out as he pushes himself up — she wants to take a bite out of those thighs.

As he settles against the headboard of the bed, she can't wait anymore and walks over quickly. This glorious body, like a statue carved out of exquisite marble and come alive — she needs to worship it, taste every part of his skin, feel his muscles under her fingertips. He deserves so much.

"Lean back, sweet pet." She kneels down on the bed and waits until he sits still. Grabbing his arm, she secures it up and to the side with a leather belt around his wrist. She works quickly, making her movements firm and secure. Then she climbs over him to the other side, doing the same there and makes sure that the soft leather straps don't bite into his skin. The intricate decorations of the iron headboard would hold him on these two binds alone but it's not enough to make him feel secure.

His eyes follow her every movement and widen when he sees her pull a soft rope out from under the pillow. She arranges his legs so that he sits comfortably but his thighs are wide apart. Then she straddles him, trapping his erection between them.

"You will not be able to move, sweet thing. You have nothing to do, just feel." She looks at him, noticing the strained smile he wears. "I can see your mind working, how you worry."

"I'm sorry Mistress, I just don't know..."

"Cullen," she says, giving her voice a commanding tone. It immediately gets his attention, ever the soldier. "Let go. Let it happen. Give yourself over to me." She waits until she sees his eyes glaze over. Then she puts her hand on his eyes and makes him lean his head back. "You are mine. I do what I want with you."

She waits for him to take it in, for that softness that overcomes him when he gives in. But he's still fighting. She shoves her hand under his chin, pressing the collar into his throat, making it hard to breathe. "Mine. You have no wants, you have no needs. You are mine. Give yourself over."

She waits with bated breath, seeing the struggle on his features and then it happens. His eyes soften. He sinks into the binds, his shoulders slacking and his mouth opens with a sigh. His head falls forward. She releases his throat and leans forward to wrap her arms around him. Kissing the skin above the collar, she holds him close to her chest. "Mine," she whispers in his ear.

"Yah," he mumbles, his mouth not quite working.

She waits for his breathing to slow down and then she fastens the rope to the iron headboard and begins to loop it around his body in a specific pattern.

She hums a soft melody, it helps her to remember in what order she has to loop the rope and it gives Cullen a sense of where she is. With each loop, she ties him more to the headboard. She crosses the rope over his chest, loops it through the metal decorations at his back and lays it over his other shoulder to cross it in front of his chest. Tying the knot, she strokes over the ropes and the skin around them, making sure that it doesn't pinch him. She kisses his skin, every part of his chest that isn't covered with the pattern while she fishes another rope from under the pillow.

Her kisses lead up to his arms and she ties a rope around it. The same happens to his other arm, soft kisses for every touch to his skin and then she secures him. Already he cannot move at all but she has one last thing to do. A soft, silken scarf is her last piece and she ties it over his eyes.

"So beautiful," she murmurs. She makes sure that her wet labia lips rub against his erection and leans forward to kiss the skin between the ropes. Every bit deserves a kiss, his chest, his nipples, the sensitive skin on his throat, his arms and his stomach. Then she scoots down, kissing his hip bones, his thighs, anywhere but his penis. She watches him the whole time, making sure that he is still relaxed, held securely by the ropes.

From a bowl of warm grease on the bedside table, she takes a new toy, a plug for Cullen's ass. It's a slim one, made of smooth metal. She slides off his lap and kneels between his legs, slowly massaging the skin behind his balls and the ring of tight muscle. "I'm going to put a plug into you."

He tenses and she hums at him. "Shh, relax sweet thing, I'm not going to hurt you, not with this." She can still sense his hesitation and she grabs his legs under his knees and shoves them up, making him spread his ass up and wide. "Who owns this?"

"You, Mistress." His answer comes immediately and then he falls into his chant with a soft sing-song voice. "My body is yours, my body is yours..." With every repeat of his chant, he sinks deeper into the ropes, his muscles going soft.

She massages his tight entrance with the grease, in the rhythm of his chant until he relaxes there as well. The plug goes in with a plop, the oblong base settling nicely between his cheeks.

"Oh," he gasps and Alissa keeps her finger on the plug as she leans forward and kisses his penis. He moans and he doesn't stop moaning as she kisses along his shaft and applies pressure to the plug, pushing against it in a slow rhythm.

Every movement of the plug causes him to gasp and twitch. Precum sits on top of his penis and she licks it off.

"I knew you'd like this." She lets go of the plug, not missing his soft whine at the loss of stimulation and moves up to cover his body with her own. Every bit of his skin deserves to be touched, to be kissed. She traces the skin next to the ropes with her tongue, kisses his nipples and takes one between her teeth.

Lying between his spread legs, she pulls on his nipple with her teeth as she traps his erection between them. She can feel him twitch against her stomach. He gasps, his head lolling back. His face, unguarded with the blindfold, is a canvas of joy and utter giving.

The heady rush of having him under her control, at her mercy, makes her shiver. She knows that he will shatter if she ever betrays this trust. He gives her his all, hands himself to her and she has to protect this gift forever.

"My sweet, sweet Cullen, you are wonderful." Peppering kisses on his abdomen, she raises herself up and guides him inside of her. Slowly she sinks down, until he is fully sheathed inside of her, making her moan. "You feel so good, sweet thing."

He whimpers, this sweet little sound of torture and pleasure that she loves to hear from him. She holds herself still until he has calmed down and then slowly begins to undulate her hips. Adjusting the angle, she shifts him into her so that he sits right and gives herself room to touch herself. She moves slowly, more rutting than pumping, circling her hips and pushing against him in short bursts.

Every movement of her hips causes him to moan, a contant song of his pleasure and torture. She knows that every move causes the plug in his ass to press against his prostate, stimulating him even more. By know he must fight to keep himself from spilling, judging by the vein protruding from his neck, the way his hands clench into fists and how his moans have turned into mindless babbling, her name in a constant stream of prayer.

"Alissa, Alissa, please, Mistress, please, for you, please, I'll be good, please," he sings, his moans the chorus to his song.

"I know you're good, my sweet Cullen, and I will let you come if you hold out just a little longer." She stops moving, waiting for his breath to slow down. Sitting still, she plays with her clitoris, making her own song rise in her. Her breath quickens, tremors from her core climbing up her spine and soon she feels her own control slipping, chasing that crescendo building up in her.

She begins riding him in earnest now, needing her own satisfaction, watching him as the stimulation from her body becomes almost unbearable. She raises herself up, letting him almost slip out before she slams back down, taking him as deep as she can. He bites his lip, a sob escaping him.

"Please, Mistress, please," he cries.

She slows down, leaning forward so that her clitoris rubs against him. Slow circles with her hips and his shaft inside her rubbing her in that special place, soon she is helplessly quivering, her own control slipping.

"Soon..."

She touches his chest, her fingernails scratching over his skin and she stares at the blindfold, watching every moment of sweet torture on his face. Pushing harder, deeper against him, her song rushes up in her and with one last push she cries out, her nails digging into his flesh.

"Now, come for me," she yells as her body slips from her control, shaking and thrumming with her peak washing over her. His cry mixes with hers, his body shaking as he spills. She falls forward, still trembling, holding on to him as her hips seem to have a mind of their own, taking from him all he can give.

Lying against his chest, she hears his hammering heart and it brings her back to her senses enough to loosen the ropes and release his hands from the leather belts. As soon as his arms are free, he wraps them around her, his whole body curling around her and he holds onto her as much as she holds on to him.

He cries against her shoulder, occasionally shuddering as if his release never ends.

"I'm here, sweet Cullen, I got you," she whispers into his hair. "You're safe, you were perfect, my Cullen, you're wonderful."

His whole body shakes and he murmurs her name like a prayer. "Alissa, Alissa..."

Her heart lurches as he says her name with so much reverence. "I'm here Cullen, I'll hold you as long as you like." She feels him slipping out of her, their essence staining the blankets she had thrown on. "I got you, you're mine."

"Yours," he says, softly and then, as if he tries it on for size, louder and secure, "Yours."

"Mine," she murmurs, holding him tighter.

After a long time she feels him calm down. He kisses her neck, up to the tip of her ear and it tickles. "Oh, you wicked..." She pushes him up to look at him, relieved to see him smiling. His eyes still have that dreamy glaze but he seems to be coming back. "Let's get this cleaned up and then we can get comfortable." She pulls at the ropes still tangled around his body but he puts his hand on hers to still her.

"Let me, please," he says.

"Don't worry, I'm just — " she wants to tell him that the game is over but stops when she sees how he looks at her.

"Alissa, I told you, I love to serve," he says, "please let me serve you."

She hesitates but then lets go of the ropes and sits back. It makes sense, really. Service is ingrained in him, it's why he became a templar and now, as the leader of the forces, his ability of servitude has gone unused. She watches him as he removes the ropes, folding them neatly in a pile with a serene smile. He slides off the bed, crawling and hobbling with the bundle of ropes tucked under one arm and carries them over to the chest where she keeps all their toys.

While he is busy at the chest, she folds the soiled blankets into a pile and prepares the bed for them. Sitting down again, she watches him crawl back to her. He smiles at her and when he reaches her, he kneels down and leans against her naked leg. She strokes his hair, scratching his scalp. "Very good, my pet. Now, can you take these blankets into the bathroom, please?"

"Yes, Mistress." He tries to carry them like he carried the ropes, tucked under one arm, but they slide off and the bundle comes apart. "I'm sorry, Mistress, I..."

"Wait, I'll put them on your back." She ties the bundle tight and places it on his back. He has to crawl slowly to keep it balanced but it stays. She can see the tapered base of the plug still in his arse as he crawls and grins to herself. Her pet seems to have taken a liking to it.

Watching him carrying the bundle has a new idea form in her mind for their next play, a basket he could carry in his mouth. It would go well with what she has in mind for their next time.

Cullen comes back to her, leaning against her leg again as he reaches her, content at her feet. She strokes his hair, letting the golden curls slip through her fingers.

"Are you tired, my pet?"

"A little, Mistress."

"Would you sleep here on the floor?" she wonders.

"If it pleases you, Mistress."

"Maybe next time, now I want you to come up here to me."

"Thank you Mistress."

She slides under the covers and waits for him to crawl up. "Wait, kneel, face down," she orders and waits for him to present his bottom to her. "Beautiful," she says, looking at the dark base of the plug between his perfectly sculpted cheeks. "But the plug has to come out now." She pulls at it, carefully, waiting for him to relax. "Sweet thing, you have to let go of it."

He moans quietly, taking a deep breath, sinking down on his arms and then she can pull it out and place in a bowl on her bedside table.

"There you go. Now come here." She holds the covers open for him and waits for him to crawl in next to her. As soon as he is close to her, he curls up around her, his head on her shoulder, holding onto her like she could float away from him. She holds him tight, softly stroking over his back. His head on her shoulder is a bit uncomfortable but she endures it for now.

Before he can drift off to sleep, she pulls her arm out from under his head to take off the collar.

"No," he mumbles.

"No? But it's time to take it off."

"I don't want to," he softly whines.

She hesitates but then decides that this is a conversation they need to have outside of their game. The collar needs to be off. The leather slips easily out of the buckle and she pulls it out and holds it up for him to see. "Why do you want to keep it on?"

He looks at her, his eyes clear. He raises himself on his elbow, a frown marring his forehead and strokes the edge of the collar with his finger. "It makes me feel owned, like I belong to you." He looks up to her. "I want that... to be owned, by you."

"Oh darling," she says, caressing his cheek with her thumb, "outside of our games here, we can't — "

"I know." He takes the hand that holds the collar and kisses her knuckles. "I'd just like to pretend a little longer."

"Come here." She drops the collar and pulls him close, kissing him, tongues tangling, hungry, desperate, devouring him until she has to catch a breath. Those lips are dangerous. Pressing her forehead against his, she wills her heart to stop hammering too fast. "We will discuss this another time, when we're both more clear headed."

He nods and lies back down. She scoots into his arms, her back to him and lets him hold her. "So you liked the plug?"

"Yes, very much," he murmurs.

"I have another one I'd like you to try out, next time. I have a fun game planned."

"Hmm, I can't wait." His voice is low and drowsy, he will soon sleep.

She kisses his hand and holds it there, her lips touching his knuckles. He is a solid wall of warmth at her back, his scent enveloping her. Listening to his breathing, she can tell that he has fallen asleep.

 _Owned_. She shudders at the memory of how he said it, the adoration in his voice. He wants to be owned by her.

_Oh creators, I love him too much._


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Puppy play!!  
> Yes, this whole chapter is just puppy play, with a tail plugged in Cullen's ass and mittens for paws and all that. So if that isn't your thing, just skip it, there's honestly not much else happening here.

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Alissa puts a robe over her naked body and lays out the toys she had ordered discreetly over the last few weeks. Looking at the beautiful things, her stomach begins to flutter in anticipation. Cullen will love this, even if he isn't aware of it yet. Trailing her fingertips lovingly over the toys, she places a few other things around the room. She has a plan tonight.

The door opens and closes again, the lock being turned and she recognizes Cullen's steps on the stairs up to her. She looks at him, checking if he wants to talk to her first. But he gives a small nod and begins to undress. Alissa nods back and turns to stroll over to the spanking bench. She hears his clothes rustle and that distinct sound when he opens the box with his collar. The following moment of silence makes her curious and she peeks over her shoulder.

Her breath hitches in her throat as she sees him. He is already naked and on his knees, his eyes closed as he places the collar around his neck. The light of the fire makes his skin glow golden and shows off his terrific form. His beauty is blinding and when the collar is closed, she is almost envious of the calmness he radiates.

Alissa turns back towards the spanking bench, waiting for him to come to her, willing the tickle of excitement in her stomach to calm down. She hears him crawl and watches as he arranges himself on the old prayer bench, as it has become their routine. She counts his breaths, waiting for him to settle.

She counts to six before he calms. His breathing deepens, his shoulders untense and his mouth opens a little. Only then, she places her hand between his shoulder-blades and speaks to him.

"Sweet pet, I'm here."

"My Mistress," he says softly.

"Are you ready to begin?"

His eyes close and his lets his head hang down as he grips the legs of the prayer bench. "Yes, I am ready, Mistress. Please give me my pain to ground me."

Alissa's heart flutters when his deep voice says these words of submission. His calm acceptance is just as much a balm to her soul as it is to his.

She opens the box next to the spanking bench and takes out the flogger with a smile. She doesn't tie him up this time, he looks calm and relaxed right now. Instead she places her hand on the back of his neck, grounding him with her touch as she begins to strike him. It is routine by now, twenty strokes with the flogger to warm him up and then as many strokes as she finds appropriate with the paddle.

He counts out the strokes, his voice quickly changing from tense to lose. She can't quite describe it but she can hear it in his voice as he counts, the exact moment when he starts to drift. It's a moment that makes her heart flutter again.

She gives him thirty hard hits with the paddle and by the end of it, he hangs over the bench, all his muscles slack, his mouth open and tears falling to the floor like glittering jewels. His last count is almost unintelligible, but he says it, just like with each hit before.

Letting her hand slide from his neck down his back, she places a kiss between his shoulder blades and says, "Done, go to your rest, pet."

He drops down from the bench and crawls the three steps over to his resting mat, taking his position like she had told him to. After covering the bench with a cloth again, she sits down next to him and lays her hand between his shoulder blades. It calms him to feel her like that. She gently strokes his back, giving him time to resurface. When he has stopped crying, she holds the waterskin to his lips and lets him suckle.

"Back with me, my Cullen?" she asks, as she applies elfroot salve to his backside.

He groans, pressing his ass against her hand as she spreads the salve over his bruised skin. "Yes, Mistress."

"I have something planned for tonight and I need you attentive when I tell you about it."

She strokes one last time over his back and then walks over to the fireplace to put more logs on the fire. She isn't wearing much herself and with Cullen completely naked, she wants the room to bethere nice and warm. Then she sits down on her bed, where she has spread out the utensils for tonight's game.

"Sit up, Cullen," she orders. She waits for him to look at her and holds up a special set of gloves. "Tonight, my sweet, fereldan pet, you're going to be a puppy."

"Mistress?"

"This will be a fun game, trust me."

He still looks a bit apprehensive but he nods. "Yes, Mistress, I trust you."

"Come here." She puts the gloves to the side and picks up a set of leather pads with thick padding in them. "These pads are not just for the puppy game but they arrived at the same time as the gloves. You will wear these from now on, to protect your knees."

He has crawled over to her and kneels between her legs. "When will I put them on?"

"After you've put on the collar. They will be on the table right next to your collar."

He bows his head. "Thank you Mistress."

"Anything for my sweet pet," Alissa says, stroking over the back of his head. "I don't want you to get hurt. Now put them on." She hands him the pads and watches as he tightens the straps around his knees and lower legs.

She picks up a leather harness with fuzzy ears attached to it. "Some people use hoods and gags but I'm no fan of those. I want to see your beautiful face and I have use for your mouth and tongue, so..., just the ears." Next she picks up the gloves. They look like mittens and are decorated with fur on top and padding on the bottom, making them look like paws.

"Hold your hands up." She waits for him to obey and slips a glove over each hand and tightens the straps around his wrists. "So, now you have paws and can't use your hands anymore. How do you feel?"

Cullen holds the paw up, looking at it and then places it on her knee. "It's strange, not feeling your skin."

"I can feel you just fine, sweet thing."

He smiles, his eyes hooded. "Yes, Mistress."

She smiles back. "I'm glad you understand. Now this here, this will be your tail." She holds up the harness with the plug and the long, fluffy tail attached to it. "Puppies don't speak but you can wag your tail for me."

His eyes go wide and his penis twitches.

"This harness will hold the plug in place and I can also attach certain things here for your penis." She shows him the front of the leather harness. "But for now, I'll only put a simple strap here to tie him to your stomach, nothing restricting."

Putting the harness to the side, she holds up a polished wooden stick in the stylized shape of a bone. "Since I don't want to use a gag on you, I have this bone here for you to carry in your mouth, unless it's otherwise busy. It'll remind you not to speak and make you drool, which will be adorable."

"Mistress..." He looks panicked at the head harness and the bone, redness going from his face and neck all the way down to his stomach. She can tell by now that it's a delicate balance with him; part of him craves the humiliation, the other part balks at wanting it.

Alissa takes his chin in her hand and pulls him towards her. "Cullen, just try it, for me."

He visibly relaxes. "Yes, Mistress, for you."

She slips two fingers under his collar and pulls it tight, holding him, choking him, watching as he fights to swallow past the collar. She puts her mouth right next to his ear, letting him feel her breath. "This collar makes you mine, body and mind. Mine. You gave yourself to me with this collar. You are my pet. I decide what you want and you will accept it. Do you understand, pet?"

"Yes, Mistress." His voice is choked but she can see the relief flowing through him. "I'm yours. Body and mind."

It's an illusion, that she would force him to do things he hates. She never would and it's part of their trust that they both know this. But he needs the illusion. He needs to feel claimed, unable to decide for himself. There is freedom in obedience.

She stops choking him but keeps her hand on his neck, stroking along the collar. "Now, my Cullen, once I finished all this preparation, I will ask for your color and if you say it's gold, you will be a puppy. You won't have hands, you'll have to use your mouth to carry things. You won't speak and you won't touch yourself and the only way you'll get off tonight is by humping my leg."

He goes very still and blushes all the way down his neck.

She leans forward and kisses his lips softly. "You don't have to, it's up to you," she murmurs against his lips.

He shudders, breathing hard through his mouth, and leans into the touch of her lips. His voice is rough when hs answers, "I understand, Mistress. I... I understand."

Watching his reaction, her whole body tingles with a rush of joy. The way he gives himself to her, trusts her to know what he'll like, it makes her feel larger than life. She slips into the relief of her role the same way as he slips into his.

She leans back, her hand still on his cheek. "Except for your colors, you will not speak. So, do you have any questions, anything you want to say before you become a little puppy?"

"What will I do?"

His voice still has that hoarse edge to it and it makes heat pool between her legs. She's going to miss his voice but it will be worth it. She gently strokes her thumb over his cheek. "Silly pet, I'll tell you what to do, you're just going to be my excited little pup. You're fereldan, aren't you people part dog anyway?"

Cullen grins. "Some people say so." He raises a hand to his face and is startled to look at the paw. "Oh, this..."

"You'll get used to the paws and I'll help you take them off again when we're done. Nothing will happen to you, I'll take care of you."

He looks up to her with a soft smile, relaxing again. "Yes, Mistress, I trust you."

She takes the harness with the fuzzy ears and a heavy, black leather leash and holds them up. "What's your color?"

He straightens on that, holding his head high and sits like a proud mabari. "Gold, Mistress."

"Good." She sets the ears on his head and fastens the strap under his chin. The fur on the wolf-like ears is slightly darker than his hair but it's a good match. Scratching lightly behind his ears, she holds the bone to his lips. "There, my little puppy, take your bone."

He doesn't hesitate, bending down to her hand, taking the bone between his teeth and then looks up to her, his lips stretched wide by the toy and a drop of drool already forming in the corner of his mouth.

"You look great, such a pretty little puppy. Now turn around, you need your tail."

A blush spreads out from his cheeks down his neck but he dutifully turns his backside to her.

"Take your resting position."

It's such a delightful sight to see him stretch out his strong back, bending his ass up. The muscles in his thighs twitch nervously and his butt cheeks are still pink from the spankings. He looks gorgeous already, delicious enough to eat and she feels hot despite only wearing the thin robe. She puts her hand on his back, drawing soothing circles over his back as she slowly moves closer to his hole.

Nervousness is radiating of him, he's not used to getting plugged yet. But she knows he likes it and the way his penis is twitching, his body is possibly more ready than his mind. Humming, she strokes over his back, his thighs, waiting for him to calm down. After a long time of stroking him, giving him the time he needs to adjust, his back stretches low, and the muscles in his shoulders turn soft. He breathes deep and slow, and only now she puts a generous amount of oil on her finger and massages around the rim of his hole, still soothingly stroking his back.

"Sweet pet, you're so gorgeous, you'll look so beautiful with that lovely tail." Her finger circles his rim. "There, sweet thing, open up for me." She waits for him to relax and then slips a finger in. She takes her time to prepare him, letting him relax as she massages him, until she deems him ready and presses the plug against the ring of muscle. He groans as the thick plug slips in, drool dripping from his mouth and his ass tightening around the slimmer section. This plug has the same kind of tapered base as the other, to be worn comfortably while he moves around.

Alissa tightens the harness around his hips and adjust the straps that hold the fluffy tail up and make sure that the plug can't slip out. Two leather straps go over his crotch on either side of his balls, up to his stomach and attach to the belt around his hips. She could fit different attachments between those two straps but for now she settles with a simple leather strap going across, pressing his penis against his stomach.

She checks once more that the straps all sit tight and orders him to turn back around.

"Be careful when you sit down," she says, watching him move slowly, grunting when the plug presses into him. "Now, wag your tail."

He turns deep red, hesitates, but finally overcomes the humiliation and shakes his ass so that the tail swings from side to side.

"Very good," Alissa says. "You look gorgeous, my sweet little puppy."

He looks like he wants to say something but bites his bone instead. For a moment she thinks that he tries to bark but he isn't quite ready for that, not yet. But he wags his tail again, blushing deep red.

"That's my pretty pup. Now come here, I'm gonna put you on a leash and we'll be walking around the room a bit."

The leash clicks into place and she stands up and pulls it tight, so that his head is pressed against her leg. She starts walking, forcing him to crawl beside her, over to one side of the room and back again. He stumbles at first, the new setting confusing him and feeling the tail-plug move with every crawling step probably adds to his insecurity. She slows down her steps to give him time to adjust and let's her voice sound deep and soothing.

"Very good, my little pup, you're doing so well. Let's do this round one more time." She leads him in a tight circle, holding the leash short enough to make him feel it, pulling the collar tight to his throat. "There you go, what a perfect pup you are. My puppy. I never owned a better pup."

On the word 'owned' he visibly shudders and his back straightens. A transformation seems to go over him as he sinks into the role. What little struggle and reservation he had at first is gone now, he crawls with her flawlessly, focussed on doing this correctly. She's pretty sure that he started drifting, finally letting go of his thoughts.

She leads him to a bowl of water she has prepared next to the door to the balcony and lets the leash hang slack. "Drop your bone, puppy." He leans down and lets the piece of wood fall to the floor. Looking up to her expectantly, drool drips from his mouth but he doesn't try to wipe it away and he even wags his tail. It looks adorable and she can't help but smile. "Oh, aren't you just the cutest! Now drink, puppy, you must be thirsty."

There is only a moment of hesitation before he sinks down on his forearms and laps up the water from the bowl. His cheeks are flushed but he closes his eyes and keeps on lapping and slurping up water. His penis, pressed against his stomach by the harness, is fully hard and leaking. She grins to herself, she knew how much he would like this.

"Good puppy, drink up, sweet thing." She waits until some of the water is gone and then pulls at the leash. "Pick up your bone, puppy." He does as told, water dripping from his chin.

She leads him back to her desk and sits down in her chair. "You're my good puppy, so I'm going to let you off the leash for a moment. You'll be a good dog and do what I tell you, right?"

A sound comes from Cullen, not quite a bark yet, more like a grunt but he wags his tail again in answer. "Good boy." She clips the leash off and points to the other side of the room. "See, there is a basket with food over there, go and get that and bring it here."

He crawls over to the wicker basket. It has a large handle and Cullen looks at it, chewing on his bone for a moment, before he places it carefully on the ground and picks up the basket with his teeth. Holding his head up high, her crawls back to her, carrying the basket.

_How he loves this!_

She watches him, as he carries the basket. His eyes are glazed over, spit drips down his chin and he holds himself so proudly. His erection, thick and red and trapped under the harness, is dripping with precum but that doesn't even seem important now. He looks relaxed and happy, utterly content in his role and that makes her feel warm inside.

Cullen drops the basket at her feet and looks up to her, swallowing once and then letting his mouth hang open like a dog would, dipping his tongue forward.

"Get your bone, sweet puppy."

He turns back around, his ass delightfully moving for her, the tail swinging from side to side. He comes back to her with the bone between his teeth, and sits down carefully, wary of the tail pressing the plug into him.

"Such a good boy you are." She pats his head and picks up the basket from the floor. There's some bread and halla-cheese, her favorite, in the basket and also some cured ham, cut into little pieces. "Sit down here, next to me and put your bone down," she says without looking at him.

She can feel his presence next to her and pats his head again without looking at him. As she prepares a bread with cheese for herself, he nudges her arm with his head. She smiles to herself. "Is my little puppy hungry?"

Another nudge with his head and when she looks at him, he grins with a twinkle in his eyes. Yes, he enjoys playing this game, not even just for sexual reasons. She wonders how much he had been able to play as a boy, before the rigid structure of the templars killed that boyish joy she sees in his eyes now.

She picks up a piece of ham and holds it out to him. He picks it up gingerly with his lips and chews it carefully. She waits for him to swallow and gives him the next piece as she bites into her own bread. They eat in silence, her feeding him.

"You must be thirsty, puppy, go to your bowl and drink something." He dutifully crawls over to the far wall, and leans down on his forearms again to drink from the bowl. She watches him move, the graceful bend of his back, the play of muscles as he crawls, how his shoulders tense as leans forward.

Alissa takes a jar of honey from the basket and goes over to the sofa. She makes herself comfortable with a pillow at her back. "Come here puppy, I have a dessert for you." He looks up and turns, looking so adorable with his fuzzy ears standing up.

He crawls over to her and his eyes go wide when she spreads her legs for him, showing that she wears nothing under her robe. She dips a finger into the honey pot and spreads honey over her folds. "Come, little puppy, get your snack."

He hurries over to her, the pads under his knees smacking on the hard floor. Before he came up to her room, she has placed a mat and a thick fur in front of the sofa, to make it comfortable for him to sit at her feet.

Cullen sits down between her legs, carefully putting weight on the plug in his ass. He immediately dives forward to lick her, growling a bit like a true dog. Alissa leans back against the pillow with a happy sigh. "Yes, good, I know you'll be doing so well, licking me like the good puppy you are," she babbles, moaning as he twirls his tongue around her clitoris. "Oh Creators, you're so good. My puppy dog, so good..."

She rushes towards her orgasm, as she always does with him, his skill and dedication irresistible. Even if she wanted to draw it out, make him work more, she couldn't. He has her writhing and screaming in joy in mere minutes. She falls over the edge of her pleasure, here thighs closing around his head. Like a heatwave, it washes through her, leaving her trembling.

"Oh, mythal'enaste, my sweetness, you're amazing." She leans forward, pulls on his collar and nuzzles his nose. "My sweet pup, mine alone, mine," she whispers and he shudders on the word 'mine'.

She pulls roughly on his collar, pressing his face back into the apex of her thighs. "Again, pup, show me what you're good at."

He obliges, licking her slowly but steady. He's completely calm in his concentration, just focused on his task. It takes her a bit longer now to reach her climax but his dedication is unwavering. One of his paws lies on her thigh but he only uses his tongue on her, untiring. With a steady rise, her breath coming in gasps, she crashes over the wave again, grinding against his face as she whimpers.

"Creators," she sighs in bliss. "Sweet puppy, you're so wonderful. I'm glad you're mine." She pulls him away from her crotch by his collar, offering him her leg to grind against if he wants to. His arousal is obvious, trapped against his stomach, his erection stands strong and firm, precum leaking from it.

"You can hump my leg if you want, puppy, I don't mind."

He raises himself up on his knees, his paws on her thigh, hips snapping forward but when he makes contact with her leg, he freezes. A blush creeps down his neck and panic sets in his face. This is not going the direction she wants and Alissa puts a stop to it. Scratching behind his ears, she pulls him down again by his collar. "Maybe not tonight. It's fine, my sweet puppy dog, you don't have to."

He is nervous and tense again, twitching, as he sits back down. A groan leaves him when the plug moves in him, he is still very aroused but humping her leg is obviously too much for him. She waits for him to relax, watching him closely. "We can stop if you want, Cullen. Tell me your color."

"Silver," he whispers hoarsely.

She nods and puts her hand on his shoulder. "Good, tell me what troubles you."

He swallows. "It's... humiliating."

She smiles at him. "That's kind of the point though?"

Now he also smiles, blushing again. "True. I like it, I do... being on my knees for you, how you fed me..."

"Sometimes it's difficult to admit to ourselves what we like."

He nods with a shy smile. "I guess that's true. I'm not quite... not quite there, yet."

Her heart burns for him, for his honesty and vulnerability. She puts her hand on his cheek and looks him in the eyes. "That's alright, Cullen, there's no right or wrong way about this. If you want, we can just keep it like this, you sitting here, being a little puppy. It's up to you how far you want to go."

"I'd like that, staying here like this."

"I have a book here, how about I read out loud for us and we relax and just enjoy each others company?"

He nods. "Yes, just one thing before we go back to puppy play." He looks up to her and the adoration in his eyes makes her heart skip again.

She strokes his cheek with her thumb. "What?"

"Can you kiss me, please? Because a puppy doesn't get kissed like that..."

A knot in her chest feels like it is about to burst and she smashes her lips against his to stop herself from whimpering. He kisses back, hungry, desperate, suckling on her lips, their tongues stroking each other until they run out of breath.

Leaning her forehead against his, she gives them both a few minutes to calm down. "Creators, I... you're so wonderful," she says, stopping herself from saying what her silly heart wants her to confess.

"Alissa..." He doesn't say more, only breathes, but it's enough to make her heart clench again.

She moves back, abruptly, gathering her control, leaving him stumbling forward. "Now, since we've already interrupted," she says, keeping her voice carefully neutral, "I'd like to check on your plug, to make sure you're not getting hurt."

"Ah, yes," he says and turns around, placing his forehead on his folded arms. She removes the leather band from the harness and takes the base of the plug between her fingertips, letting the tail sit loosely in her hand and pulls carefully. He trembles and groans when the plug comes out with an obscene pop.

She checks his gaping hole, looking for irritations and abrasion. Putting a generous amount of elfroot salve on her finger, she spreads the salve around the rim. Then she puts even more salve on the plug and presses it back against his tightening hole. "Do you like the plug, Cullen?"

"Yes, very much," he says, his voice going back to that low register that tells her that he begins to drift again.

"Here it comes, take it back in. Once it sits, you're a puppy again, understood?"

"Yes, Mistress.

"Your color?"

"Gold," he says and it sounds like a relieved sigh.

The plug slips in and Cullen groans again. She tightens the strap over it and strokes his back, letting the tail slip through her hand, just gently moving the plug that way. The noises he makes cause heat to pool in her stomach.

"Are you happy, little puppy?"

He turns around and nuzzles her hand.

Scratching his head softly, she settles into a comfortable position and picks up her book from the side table. Cullen leans his head against her thigh, watching her.

She looks down to him and smiles. He looks adorable, the way he looks up to her, his chin on her thigh. "Little pup, since you don't have much fur, I want you to get that woolen blanket over there."

He crawls over, his ass with the tail swinging from side to side. The redness in his face may be from the humiliation but she suspects that it's more the plug doing very interesting things to him when he moves. The blanket is heavy and he struggles with pulling it behind him with this teeth. At last he moves backwards, giving her an enticing view of his backside again.

"Very good, pup," she says and takes the blanket from his mouth. "Go to your bowl and drink something." His mouth has to be dry from the blanket. And she loves watching him crawl like that and by the way he blushes and trembles sometimes, he likes it too.

He leans down and laps up the water. She knows that human tongues don't really work for that and she has a waterskin ready for him at her side but rituals are important for him. She can see how he slips back into the role, all the thoughts in his head quieting down.

"Come here pup," she says and he hurries back to her, water dripping from his chin. "I think this will be easier for you," she says and holds the waterskin to his mouth. He gives her a grateful smile and drinks rapidly, his eyes glazing over as he watches her.

"There's a good puppy," she says when the waterskin is empty. "Now settle down on your mat, I'm gonna put the blanket over you and read you a story, alright?"

Cullen makes a soft 'woof' sound, turning beet red at the same time, and settles down on his haunches. He twitches a bit, obviously from the plug moving inside of him but seems to find a good position.

Alissa drapes the blanket over him and makes sure that it covers him well. Another blanket goes over her own shoulders. She picks up the book, a romance novel about a dalish elf and a pirate that somehow has made its way into Skyhold's library. She wonders if she should ask Cassandra if it's hers.

"The wind on the coast had died down but the water still looked grey and angry. A lone figure stood at the shore, holding her hand up to her eyes to watch the horizon," she reads out. Cullen's weight settles against her leg as she continues to read the story of Lirg'letha, the dalish elf and how she ends up on a pirate ship.

"You're feeling good puppy?" she asks. He looks at her with half lidded eyes, the blanket hiding his body, but he nuzzles her leg with a smile. "I take that as a yes. So let's see, we should meet the pirate soon, I wonder if he has an equally ridiculous name."

He does. His name is Fabio the Ferocious.

*~*~*

Loud knocks on her locked door wake her. Alissa sits up, looking around disoriented. She is still on the sofa, he feet tucked under the blanket, the book balancing perilously on the edge of the sofa. On the mat on the floor, rolled up under his own blanket, sleeps Cullen.

"Inquisitor?" comes a muffled voice from the door. "Are you quite alright?"

"Yes, give me a minute," she answers, shaking Cullen by his shoulder at the same time.

He looks up, confused, a trail of drool sliding down his chin.

Her gaze falls on the collar around his neck and the mittens on his hands. A grin spreads on her face. "My, my, little puppy, look at you. I'm getting my breakfast brought up, do you want to greet the kitchen maid?"

His eyes go wide in panic but he doesn't say a word.

She gets up and leans down to him. "You better hide in the bathroom, little puppy, I'm gonna open the door now." She strides towards the stairs, hearing him scramble and crawl to the bathroom. She waits for the bathroom door to close behind him before she unlocks the door and lets the kitchen maid in.

"Are you quite well, Lady Inquisitor?"

"I'm fine. Commander Cullen and I fell asleep on the sofa last night, that's why the door was still locked."

"Oh, the Commander is here? Lady Pentaghast was looking for him." The maid looks around as she places the tray on the desk.

Alissa goes over to the bathroom door and slowly presses down the handle. "Yes, he's in the bathroom just now, should I get him?" She opens the door a fraction, not enough for the maid to look in but she can hear him draw in a sharp breath on the inside.

"Oh no, Inquisitor, it's quite alright," the maid says and goes back down the stairs. "I'll be back later for the laundry."

"Thank you," Alissa says and follows the maid down to lock the door behind her again. Then she tiptoes back up and to the bathroom door and opens it quickly. "How's my puppy dog?" she says and grins when she sees the heat in his eyes.

The short panic she caused him, the threat of humiliation, has apparently been enough to have his arousal strain against the strap of the harness. He stares at her and for a moment she is afraid that she went to far, that she angered him, but then he growls low in his chest.

He jumps forward, pushing his head against her hip until she hits the back of the sofa. Then he raises himself up on his knees, his hands pawing at her until she puts her hand on his head and softly scratches his scalp.

"What a wild little puppy your are," she says. "Are you going to be a naughty pup?" She grins as his eyes go wide. "Gonna hump my leg like the horny dog you are?"

A whimper comes from him and he hides his blush in her arm but his hips snap forward, seeking friction for his straining erection. He begins to rock against her naked leg, grinding, watching her as if he expects her to tell him to stop and she gives him her biggest smile. "There's my naughty pup, such a wildling. Eager little puppy, look at you, how desperate you are."

With a groan he grinds against her again, shudders, whimpers, looking at her as he seeks the friction to satisfy himself. She pulls his chin up and smiles.

"Good little pup, so naughty. Are you gonna come all over me? Do you want me to say it?"

He whimpers, pulling himself even closer with his arms wrapped around her, rocking against her. His pleading eyes stare at her, begging her.

She leans down and whispers, "Now puppy dog, come for me."

With a moan he comes, coating his own stomach and her leg with his seed. He holds onto her, burying his face in her side as he shudders through his orgasm.

"Sweet little puppy," she says, stroking over his head. "You're so sweet but you've been very naughty, pup, you better clean that up."

A serene smile spreads on his face and he leans down and licks his release from her leg. Up and down he licks, not leaving a single speck on her skin and his eyes are half lidded as he worships her.


End file.
